


Of Kings and Sorcerers

by psychicdreams



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Arranged Marriage, Drama, F/M, Knights Plans for Merlin and Arthur, M/M, Merlin/Arthur Marriage, Mpreg, Romance, Season 4 AU, Season/Series 04
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-26
Updated: 2014-08-14
Packaged: 2018-02-10 12:53:34
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 40,041
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2025849
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/psychicdreams/pseuds/psychicdreams
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Arthur and Merlin are clearly in love, but are unaware of it. The Knights of Camelot decide to fix this before it's too late.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is a little story I've wanted to do for awhile, set in a nebulous, AU of Season 4 of the show. It might need a little suspension of disbelief, but I hope the story makes up for that.
> 
> Rating might go up later.

Gaius stared at the shuffling knights in surprise. His fingers, in the middle of making a tincture, had paused. “You want to what?”

At first there was no answer before Elyan nudged at Gwaine. He glared at the knight that had poked him, but Gaius had turned his intense stare at the young man. He knew very well how uncomfortable his silent gazes could be; he broke Merlin all the time using them and it didn’t fail in its job on Gwaine either.

“Postpone the wedding.”

“Of Arthur and Gwen? Why?”

This time it was Lancelot who answered. “It’s clear to everyone except themselves that Merlin and Arthur are in love with each other.” He tilted his head and Lancelot’s eyes were clear with honesty as he said, “This has nothing to do with my feelings for Gwen. This is what’s best for Arthur and Merlin, and even Gwen herself.”

Gaius looked from one knight to another as he protested, “The wedding is three weeks away, how are you going to stop it? I do hope you realize that just telling them this isn’t going to do any good.”

“So you know?” Percival asked cautiously.

“Of course I know,” Gaius scoffed at him and put down the bottles he was still holding. “Merlin is terrible at hiding things; I could see the moment it was happening, to both of them. I also know that neither one realizes it and they will, of course, immediately deny it if you confront them on the issue.”

“That’s why we need your help—”

“And what do you think I could do?” he interrupted Leon. “There is very little that can stop the wedding. Regardless of how they truly feel about each other, Arthur is infatuated with Gwen and her with him. I do hope you are not going to do something to imply Gwen or Arthur was unfaithful to each other.”

“No!” Elyan burst out. “No, never!”

He eyed the knight. “And how do you feel about this, Elyan? Gwen is your sister. There is no better chance of changing her status than now.”

“It’s not about that, Gaius. I love Gwen, but I’m impartial enough to see that being queen won’t make her happy. Eventually Merlin and Arthur _will_ realize their feelings, probably five or seven years down the road, and then everyone will be miserable. Arthur is too noble to take Merlin as a bedmate while married, Merlin is too self-sacrificing even to ask, and Gwen will be able to see it all and know she never really had Arthur’s heart. I don’t want her growing embittered. Let’s not even consider the pressure to be perfect as Arthur’s queen.”

“…You’ve really given that a lot of thought. You think Merlin could handle the pressure to be perfect better?”

“No, it’s just that he won’t care,” Gwaine said confidently. “He won’t care about being perfect or how what he said can be perceived. He’ll just go on and do whatever he thinks is best, and frankly, Arthur needs that. He’s in a stressful position as King and the more someone like Gwen worries about being perfect and how they’re perceived, the more Arthur worries.”

Slowly Gaius eased down to sit on a stool. The knights had given this a lot of thought, yet they had clearly failed to come up with any course of action. Of course his own first impulse was to agree for Merlin’s sake; anything to make that boy happy after all he’d sacrificed. “I’m afraid I don’t know what to tell you boys. You do realize how stubborn Arthur and Merlin are, and there is very little that will get Arthur to break off the engagement with Gwen. Not only because it will hurt her, but also because he’s already asked and wedding proceedings have already begun. It would be an embarrassment to him. Unless it was dire, to save Merlin’s life or Gwen’s, I don’t believe there’s anything you could say to Arthur that would get him to change his mind.”

There was a moment of silence before Gwaine began to smile. “Gaius, that’s perfect.”

He raised his eyebrow. “What is?”

“Merlin’s life! We tell Arthur that we’ve heard that people are beginning to really suspect Merlin has magic and there’s rumors about him being executed. Even Arthur knows that he can’t refuse to execute Merlin just because he’s his manservant!”

He felt cold slither through him. Gaius tried to tell himself that Gwaine was just using Merlin and magic together as an example, as a tool, but the knowledge was in the knight’s eyes that this was the truth. Lancelot was the first to notice his reaction and he frowned. “Gaius, are you all right? You’re pale.”

“Why would you suggest Merlin has magic?”

“...Please tell me I just didn’t give Merlin’s secret away and you didn’t know…” Gwaine mumbled as Percival smacked his head.

“Of course I knew!” he snapped, angry that Merlin was so foolish as to tell other people about his magic. Hadn’t he learned—

“I saw Merlin perform magic when I fought the griffin, and we’ve all seen little things here and there that Merlin doesn’t think we saw,” Lancelot said, attempting to reassure him.

“And Arthur?”

“Is not as oblivious as Merlin thinks he is,” Percival said with a sigh. “We’ve discussed Merlin’s magic between us, but Merlin doesn’t know that we know. Arthur said to wait to say anything because Merlin wasn’t ready to tell us on his own so we’d just ignore it.”

Gaius sighed heavily and rubbed his forehead. He had suspected something like this would happen eventually; Merlin was far too loose with his magic, it was _bound_ to happen eventually. “So you mean to tell Arthur that marrying Merlin is the only way to save him, when in fact, as king, he could merely ban the execution order?”

“He can, but he won’t. It would mean risking potential allies and even advisers turning against him,” Leon said. “If they do, they could ease among the people and encourage civil war.”

“And Arthur marrying Merlin, a warlock and a man at that, wouldn’t?”

“Well they’re just _rumors_ , right?” Gwaine stressed. “There’s no proof and if he just marries Merlin and tells no one about his magic, it just seems as if he’s fallen in love and married a man. They can’t even really argue about the status of Merlin, considering that Arthur was planning on marrying Gwen.”

“And what of Gwen in all this?”

“An initial heartbreak is better than finding out later down the road and being miserable,” Percival explained with a grim expression.

“We’ll help her through it,” Elyan vowed.

Gaius sighed. There was no dissuading the knights and he couldn’t bring himself, in his heart of hearts, to argue against it when it could mean happiness for the boy he considered his son.

-0-

Arthur lifted his head from where it was buried in a treaty as he heard a knock. Merlin never knocked and it wasn’t the dainty one of Gwen. “Come in,” he called, rubbing at a smudge of ink on his fingers. He frowned when he saw it was Gwaine, followed by Percival, Leon, Lancelot, and Elyan. They appeared grimly serious, even Gwaine. “What is it?”

Leon made sure the door was closed and Elyan took a quick look in his room to make sure he was alone. “Sire, we have come on an urgent matter.”

“What matter, Leon?”

“It’s about Merlin.”

All the possible scenarios, the declarations of wars and blighting of crops, stopped and he sighed heavily in annoyance. “What’s he done now?” he complained, flopping back in his chair.

“It’s nothing he’s done, at least right now, but we’ve heard…rumors.”

“About?”

“That he is a mage.”

His annoyance turned to concern in an instant. He’d known for two years that Merlin had magic, but as his friend had refused to confide in him, he’d seen no reason to make the boy’s life any easier by admitting he knew. That didn’t mean he and his knights weren’t doing what they could to make sure he kept his silly head. “Do you know who started the rumors?”

“No,” Gwaine answered, crossing his arms, “but I don’t think we can ignore it either. The execution laws still stand.”

“Then I’ll remove them. It won’t matter then that he’s a mage.”

“Yes it will,” Percival told him, leaning over the desk just a little. “You can’t just remove the law without risking your position and if you do that without warning, then people are really going to get suspicious and look at him even more.”

“And you can’t protect just him,” Elyan finished. “You’d seem overly partial to Merlin, as he’s _just_ your manservant to most, and even if you could stop the execution, you’d be forced by pressure to at least send him away from Camelot.”

His first instinct was to tell them they were wrong, to walk out of his room, to the balcony, and proclaim the law was rescinded right then for Merlin’s sake, but they made very valid points that he couldn’t deny. How much harder did Merlin have to make it to keep saving his rear every time he did something stupid? Did he have any idea the position he put Arthur in, having to choose between his crown and his best friend?

“You wouldn’t have come here without a solution,” he pointed out. “What do you suggest?”

It was Lancelot who answered, stepping up to the desk and seeming to square his shoulders, as if he anticipated a negative reaction to what he was about to say. “Marry Merlin, sire. If you do and Merlin’s magic is truly revealed, you have a reason to remove the law and can protect him without sending him away.”

Arthur’s jaw dropped. “ _What_?”

“Being your queen, in his case consort, offers Merlin the best protection,” Leon argued. “There is no safer position in the land and it would at least prevent Merlin from foolishly leaving Camelot to protect you, or attempting to help from a distance where we can’t save him.”

His vocal cords felt frozen as he stared at the four men in front of him. They were his friends and he trusted their judgment, but how could they suggest he stop his wedding to Gwen for Merlin? Merlin would never stand for it and how could he break Gwen’s heart for this? The memory of turning to his father and proclaiming that he would marry for love was still fresh and it felt like a smack in his face to break off the engagement.

Yet Merlin’s life was as stake. There was no way he could move to protect him in the normal way without undermining his own somewhat tenuous position and if he lost influence because of it, it would prevent him from being able to protect him when he really needed it. It wasn’t as if he didn’t care for Merlin, because he did; Merlin was his best friend and his confidant. No matter what he said to the contrary, he couldn’t bear the idea that he wouldn’t be at his side.

It would be a long hard road, supposing Merlin accepted. They would be married legally, but not physically. He could not sleep with another while married to Merlin and he couldn’t find any manner of delusion to make him believe that Merlin would accept being intimate with him. Having sex with men was not something unknown to him. As a prince it was vital that he make sure that he didn’t bear any children out of wedlock and so he had quite a bit of experience with them. However, there was no way he could ask that of Merlin. He would have to assure him that he was not expecting him to fulfill the role of consort in the bedroom even if he would have to move there.

“And you think he would agree?”

“We’re trusting that you can persuade him, sire,” Leon told him. “It’s for his own good.”

“Since when has that _ever_ made a difference with Merlin?” he muttered.

-0-

“No! You can’t call off your wedding with Gwen just for this!”

“Merlin,” Arthur complained with a sigh, watching as the man paced back and forth in the king’s bedroom. “There is no ‘just this’. It’s your _life_ we’re talking about here and I can’t protect you any other way if it comes out that you have magic, have _had_ magic in the past, and didn’t tell anyone about it.”

“I can protect myself! I won’t let you ruin your happiness and Gwen’s happiness, just for me! And why didn’t you _tell_ me you knew about my magic?!”

“That’s an argument for a whole other day, Merlin, and believe me when I say we’ll be having it later,” Arthur promised him darkly. “Right now, you need to say yes.”

“I need to say _yes_ to marry you, therefore preventing you and Gwen from having what you both want?!”

“Yes.”

“Have you explained any of this to her?”

“Not yet. I need you to agree first, or there’s no point in saying anything.”

“Oh, so you do realize that telling the love of your life that you would love to, but you can’t marry her because you have to marry your male manservant to save his life, therefore meaning his life is worth more than the love you share is not the best way to keep her?”

“Of course I know that, Merlin!” he all but shouted, flopping back on his bed and staring at the canopy above him. “What choice do I have?! I can’t see you die, I can’t send you away, and I can’t protect you without risking your life regardless!”

It was the silence that made Arthur look up at Merlin. He had stopped pacing and there was a heartbreakingly sad look in his eyes that always made him feel his heart sink to his feet. Could he ever, just for once, be a little selfish? He had never asked Arthur for anything for himself, really, and didn’t he know that no matter what it was, he’d give it to him?

“You always said you’d marry for love.”

“And I will, just not…that kind of love,” Arthur told him quietly, standing up and lightly touching Merlin’s shoulder. “I swear you will be safe, no matter what it takes.” He hesitated once before plunging on. “You don’t need to worry about… I won’t ask you to…”

“What?”

“You don’t need to fulfill the role of queen in the bedroom,” he said after clearing his throat.

Bright red colored Merlin’s cheeks and he immediately dropped his eyes to the floor. Clearly that had never occurred to him and Arthur cursed that he’d brought it up. “So are we agreed?”

“…Yes,” Merlin said with a sigh and closed his eyes. “I’m so sorry, Arthur. I’m… _so_ sorry.”

“It’s not your fault,” he whispered, reaching over to the desk and picking up a small leather pouch. He reached in and pulled out a ring he’d had made, grabbing his friend’s hand. At feeling the cold metal touch his skin, Merlin’s eyes opened and they were that infinite sadness again. As the ring settled on his knuckle, Arthur found himself reaching out and pulling Merlin to him, into a hug. No matter his feelings, he had to be the strong one right then. “We’ll figure this out, I promise. First we just have to make sure I can keep you safe.”

“But because I was stupid and careless with my magic, now people think I’m a sorcerer and I’ve ruined your chances with Gwen and I’ve made your promise to Uther a lie and—”

“Merlin…it’s fine. It’s not a lie and I won’t sacrifice your life for my…feelings for Gwen. I’m just sorry I have to ask you this, but it’s really the only way that I can see to help you.”

Merlin’s arms finally came around him in return and he felt the tremble go through his friend, just once before he got ahold of himself and stepped back. “So what’s going to happen now?”

“I have to talk to Gwen, tell her the truth, and then…make the announcement to Camelot.” He turned to the door, mentally trying to get the words he wanted to say in order, when Merlin’s voice stopped him cold.

“I won’t…be upset…if you’re still with her. I mean, I know you love her and you can…”

“No, Merlin. I won’t dishonor her or _you_ like that.” He gave a smile that felt strained to him and hoped it didn’t show. “Like I said, we’ll work it out later. I’d rather be celibate than at your funeral.”

“You look like you’re going to your own.”

Arthur turned back to the door and sighed. “Maybe I am,” he said and stepped out.


	2. Chapter 2

Merlin was silent as he stood next to Arthur, preferring to stare at the stone of the balcony or their feet as his new fiancé announced their engagement at the gathering below. The knights were at their backs, a silent comfort to him, and he had apologized profusely to them as well. He hadn’t thought that his magic would force this kind of situation. He couldn’t even met Elyan or Gwen’s eyes. At the very least the idea had been approved of by Gaius and he hadn’t had to say anything to his mentor. He’d just walked in and had been presented with his favorite food for dinner, no questions asked.

How did this affect the prophecy? From what he could glean from Gwen and Gaius, Morgana had had foretelling dreams that it was Gwen that married Arthur, but what about now? Perhaps this prophecy hadn’t taken into account the knights that had heard the rumors and took the future in their own hands? Or maybe prophecies were so broad a thing that they were useless.

There was the faintest of nudges at his spine from one of the knights behind him, Gwaine or Lancelot most likely, and he lifted his head just in time to catch the end of Arthur’s proclamation that in two weeks’ time the marriage ceremony that was to be Gwen’s would be his. He resisted the urge to blanche and hoped he didn’t seem too…unenthusiastic. It was his guilt, really, and he adored Arthur more than ever for doing this to save him from his own mistakes, even if this was all his own fault.

Arthur, complete with his crown, had turned to him and it was a testament to how long they’d known each other that he could see what Arthur was telling him with his eyes. He wanted to shake his head, but dared not. They couldn’t, Gwen could be out there watching! Yet Arthur pushed on, knew this had to be done, and his gloved hand reached out for Merlin’s. He found himself being pulled forward a little and his breath caught, though he didn’t know why.

His king’s eyes were molten blue and it was like staring into a bottomless ocean. He couldn’t possibly begin to read what was underneath the clear apology in his gaze. Tugged forward a little more and their lips were meeting. It was awkward and nerves fluttered through his stomach and they were being stared at! Then Arthur’s fingers slid into his hair, urging his head to tilt just so…and then it was perfect. Merlin was shocked to find a little whimper escaping him and his fingers gripped the chain of Arthur’s armor out of a need to do something with his hands. No wonder Gwen always looked dazed after kissing Arthur…

He wasn’t sure who ended it, but Arthur’s lips were gentle as they pulled apart, leaving little nips and nuzzles behind as if to bring him down from an amazing high. Merlin knew he was bright red and he immediately stepped back into the circle of five knights behind him. Too lost in his own guilt and amazement at what he’d felt, he couldn’t read the complicated look on Arthur’s face.

His armored arm slid around Merlin’s waist and he was led inside, away from the silent courtyard below that didn’t seem to know how to feel about what they had just been told. Once away from the eyes of the people, the king’s arm dropped from him and he turned. Before anyone could speak, Arthur said, “Merlin, I’m sorry.”

“What?”

“I know you were uncomfortable out there, but for safety it was necessary that everyone believe that we have…fallen in love. I just hope it was convincing.”

“Considering that it looked as if you were seconds from shoving your tongue down his throat, I’d say so,” Gwaine said, flashing a grin.

“Gwaine!” Arthur’s voice lanced, the single word bringing with it all the admonishment of a speech.

“N-No need to apologize,” Merlin found himself babbling. “This whole situation is my fault and really, I didn’t even notice the crowd after the first few seconds. I kind of understand why Gwen was always wandering around in a daze after you kissed and _wow_ I’m shutting up now.”

“Yes, well,” his friend said, clearing his throat and if he didn’t know better, was that a slight blush on his cheeks? “At least we know that we can convince others of our…passion.” Arthur frowned at him. “Merlin, you have to be aware that we’ll have to continue to kiss in the future, both up to the wedding, the wedding itself, and after. In public. If we don’t…”

“Then this won’t mean a thing,” Merlin agreed. “I know. I just…” He looked at the six men around him and flinched a bit. “I’m sorry. To all of you. To Gwen. To everyone. This is…my fault. I never listened when Gaius told me I had to be more careful, more discreet, and now everyone else is paying for my mistakes.”

A heavy hand landed on his shoulder and he looked up at Gwaine. “You don’t have to apologize, Merlin. It’s happened and we’ll do whatever’s best for you and Arthur. We always have and we always will. Just trust us. We know what we’re doing.”

He glanced at Arthur, who seemed to be rubbing his lips in an unconscious motion as he studied Merlin, but he decided he refused to make things more awkward than they already were. “Then…thank you.”

“This doesn’t mean I won’t tease you both mercilessly. Fair warning and all that.” He rolled his eyes at a grinning Gwaine. “Like Arthur seems this close to ravishing your mouth again.”

“Gwaine!” he protested, turning red again.

It was Arthur’s quiet voice that carried more weight. “Gwaine. Training grounds. Now.”

“…Hey, I gave fair warning, didn’t I?”

Arthur’s smile wasn’t warm. “Doesn’t mean I won’t retaliate. If you have time to tease, you have time to train.”

Merlin watched as the knights, Gwaine grumbling, began heading to the training grounds. Arthur remained for a few minutes and he touched his cheek gently, as if unaware of doing it. “We’ll get through this, Merlin. I promise. I’m doing everything in my power to make sure you’re safe.”

“…I know,” he whispered quietly and told himself that he didn’t feel a pang of longing amid the guilt as he watched Arthur follow his knights.

-0-

Merlin hadn’t been expecting to run across Gwen for at least another week, but he almost ran into her as he turned a corner with a basket of Arthur’s dirty clothes. “Gwen! Sorry! Did I bump into you?”

Her eyes were red from crying, but she at least met his gaze. “No, you didn’t.”

He shifted his weight from foot to foot, glancing up at her and then away then back again. “Are… Are you all right?”

“…Why didn’t you tell me?”

There was a moment while he considered his answer. He glanced around, but no one was near them and now he was paranoid. After all this, he had to be even more careful than before. Did Gwen think they’d been having an affair and hid it, or was she asking why he hadn’t told her about his magic? Dare he _assume_ he knew she was asking about his magic? He didn’t want to make _more_ trouble for Arthur…

“About what?”

His eyes pleaded for her to understand and she seemed to get it. “About your special talent. I thought we were friends.”

Merlin glanced around one more time, probably seeming even more suspicious just by being suspicious, but he didn’t care. Instead he nudged her a little further down the hall and into a small alcove. “Because no one was supposed to know,” he whispered. “Only Gaius actually _knew_ because my mother told me when she sent me here. I didn’t know Arthur knew about it, or the other knights, until yesterday. I thought I was being careful, I really did, but I had to use my magic.”

“Why?”

He had been prepared to have this conversation with Arthur, not Gwen, but at least this would give him a dry run at it. He licked his lips and explained as best he could. “I _am_ magic, Gwen. I didn’t study this, I was born like this. Asking me to stop is like asking me to stop breathing. Besides that, I had to use it to save Arthur’s life!”

“So from the beginning…”

“Yeah. Starting from the woman that pretended to be a singer and tried to kill Arthur, and ever since then… Do you have any idea how many people wanted to kill Arthur?” He rolled his eyes. “I thought I was being discreet, and I think I was in the beginning, but as I began to study and was forced to use it more and more, I guess I got a bit sloppy about hiding it. Gaius said I was doing it in my fevered sleep when Arthur went to get that herb.”

“Back when you swallowed the poison?”

“Yes.” He paused and then gulped. “I _tried_ to stop him, Gwen. Really. I practically begged him. I told him I’d be fine and I’d handle it if it ever got out, but you know how stubborn he is. He could have just—”

“He was right to do it,” Gwen interrupted him and he stumbled to a stop.

“What?”

She gave him a pained smile. “He’s right, Merlin. Your life is more important. I couldn’t live with myself if something happened and this could have saved you. It’s…probably better this way.”

“How could it be _better_ this way?”

“It…just is.” She stepped out of the alcove. “I have work to do. We’ll…talk later, Merlin.”

“Gwen!” he called after her, but she didn’t turn around or pause.

-0-

“Do you have all your things?” Gaius asked him as he finished sliding his spell book into the bag. He was going to be moving into Arthur’s room in the next day after the wedding. Might as well get things ready.

“I think so.” He took one last look at the small room that had been his and abruptly turned to the only father he had left. “Gaius, really… Is this the right thing to do?”

“It’s a little late for that, Merlin. The wedding is tomorrow.”

“Gaius…”

The old man sighed and sat down on the edge of the bed and at his gesture, Merlin dropped next to him. “I believe so. This shows just how much Arthur cares about you. Do you think many people, kings or otherwise, would do this for someone else? You’re marrying someone who does love you and will treat you well. It’s all I could ask, and it helps that I know that you’ll be safe with him. He would never let anything happen to you.”

“What about—”

“If this is about the prophecy, didn’t you already speak to Kilgharrah about it? You can’t live your life by a prophecy, Merlin. Are you so against this?”

“I…don’t know,” he said honestly. “It’s _Arthur_ for god’s sake. I’m marrying my best friend! He’s willing to be… _celibate_ for me, what am I supposed to do with that? When I met him, he was a spoiled brat and now he’s so… It’s kind of overwhelming and I don’t know how to feel about this. In some ways, I’m fine. It’s not like it’s going to change much, but at the same time, I feel horribly guilty about how this has affected Arthur and Gwen. Then…” He hesitated, gave Gaius a long look, before he admitted, “Then there’s this small part of me that is _excited_ about this. It’s…been there since he kissed me the first time. Is this ever going to get easier?”

“I don’t know, Merlin, but I know that I believe that this is a good thing for you, but no one, particularly Arthur, would force you into anything.”

“I can’t say no _now_ ,” he hissed. “Not after everything!”

Gaius scoffed at him. “Arthur would rather you say no and embarrass him by being rejected on his wedding day than to bind you to him and you live miserable for the rest of your life. He wouldn’t hold it against you if you said no.”

“And I won’t say no.” He would never do that to Arthur. He didn’t know what was going to happen from then on, whether he’d be miserable or not, but if he was, he’d just live with it and hide it. Arthur was doing this because he cared about him and he wasn’t going to ever forget it. “I think I owe Arthur more than I can ever repay.”

Gaius smiled at him a little and wrapped his arm around Merlin’s slightly slumped shoulders. “I’m sure he’ll find a way one way or another.”

“…Yeah, I bet he will. Probably by mucking out more stables.”

“Oh come on, you won’t be doing that anymore. You’ll be king’s consort.”

Merlin yelped at the sudden presence. “Gwaine!”

“Come on, it’s time to get your final fitting on the clothes.” The man leaning in the doorway that neither had heard come in straightened. Merlin sighed and nodded, standing up. He missed the significant look between the knight and physician.

The fitting lasted for a good two hours and he had to rush to get Arthur’s dinner. The king himself was deep in conference with the other knights by that point and he didn’t quite dare interrupt. Their eyes met only briefly before Merlin just couldn’t take it and escaped. He didn’t know what he was feeling, why shivers were going down his spine and butterflies in his stomach that had nothing to do with the guilt that he felt.

He found himself on the parapets as the sun sunk down below the horizon. It was nice and cool this time of the year with a slight breeze. It did nothing to calm his nerves and he was so wound up. Yet he couldn’t use his magic to calm himself and he was about to fret himself apart—

“Are you afraid?”

Merlin jumped and almost let out a yelp, whirling. His hands slowly lowered as he recognized it was just Arthur. That sent his heart pumping for an entirely different reason. “Of what?”

“Merlin, you can still say no.”

“Have you been talking to Gaius?” he mumbled and turned back to the town below, leaning forward on the stone. “I’m fine.”

Arthur joined him, watching as people began to filter back to their homes. He was in a loose white shirt and black pants, something he wore when he was relaxing. His eyes were drawn to the rings that the king always wore. Arthur’s thumb was rubbing against the ring on his left index finger, the one that was his mother’s. He always did that when he was nervous. “What about you?”

“I’m prepared.”

“Are you fine, though?”

“Surprisingly I’m not upset. I’m…nervous, I suppose. I’ve never been married before and this is a highly unconventional one. I don’t know what to expect, particularly tomorrow…night.”

Merlin gulped a little, hopefully not loud enough that Arthur noticed. “ _You_ can still say no.”

“I’m fine.”

He snorted and laughed a little at the repeated conversation and even Arthur chuckled a bit. “There’s a lot we haven’t talked about, that’s going to have to change when tomorrow is over with. If I’m going to be your consort, I put my foot down. No mucking out the stables anymore.”

Arthur actually laughed at that. “No mucking out the stables. Can’t have my consort doing that.”

“Right, and no more laundry. I get tired of picking up your dirty clothes. Oh, can’t forget about the polishing your boots…” He grinned widely. “In fact, I could stand to have a little pampering going on.”

“Pampering? You want me to pamper you?”

Merlin turned around and braced his back against the stone, elbows braced against it. “I think, yup. Got to keep up appearances,” he teased. He looked over only to see Arthur looking at him with his eyes a bit lidded. There was an indulgent smile and had he always been this close? He found his voice squeezing shut, words tripping over themselves as he tried to right what had suddenly turned upside down. “I e-expect a lot of pampering and it’d better be good.”

“You really don’t know what it’s like to be pampered by a king, Merlin.”

Somehow their conversation had moved from the easy, friendly one to something altogether different and it felt as if his nerves were electrified when Arthur brushed their shoulders together as he turned to go back inside. As Merlin honestly couldn’t think of a single to say, the words were left to pound in his mind as he was alone on the parapets.


	3. Chapter 3

Arthur watched as Merlin walked down the aisle. He wasn’t particularly graceful and in this case, Arthur could give him a bit of leeway. He was unused to wearing the heavy finery and a long cape that dragged behind him. At least he didn’t fall down, which was a blessing. They had to get through the wedding ceremony itself, then the coronation as consort, then the wedding feast, and then…the wedding night.

He was honestly concerned most about that. After that kiss on the balcony, he wasn’t sure what he’d do. There hadn’t been a lot of time in the past two weeks since then to even meet amid wedding plans and other daily duties, but that would change after today. If they kissed liked that too many more times, he feared he might press for more. They hadn’t discussed it, and he had thought they would the night before on the parapets when they’d been alone, but the conversation had gotten away from them.

As he listened to Geoffrey, he met Merlin’s eyes and was suddenly glad he did. His poor friend looked like he might bolt any moment and he tried to pour all the reassurance he could into his eyes. Merlin wasn’t used to being the center of attention, which was only compounded by the current situation. It seemed to calm the skittish man and he managed a brief smile despite the serious situation. The pressure on him barely registered, he was so used to it, but Merlin wasn’t. He was used to doing what he wanted, when he wanted, just because no one ever noticed a manservant.

“The ring, your highness.”

Arthur found himself hesitating at the last minute. Not the act itself, but as he looked at the ring nearby he abruptly changed in mind. Instead he slipped off his mother’s ring and studied it for a long moment before reaching out for Merlin’s hand. His partner’s gasp was hidden by those closest to them. The ring was a little loose, but not enough that it would fall off. It just…felt right, and it would only reinforce the core idea that they’d fallen in love as he never took off his mother’s ring, much less gave it to someone else.

Geoffrey turned after a moment of staring at the exchange of rings before turning and lifting the crown that he’d thought would be placed on Gwen’s head. Merlin almost seemed to flinch back, but finally stepped forward and knelt. He was suddenly glad he’d merged the wedding and the crowning to make it easier on Merlin, who seemed to chafe at the formality of the events. As Merlin stood up again, he couldn’t help wrapping his arm around his new husband’s waist. When Merlin turned to look at him, he captured those lips with his own.

There was a soft sound from Merlin and he felt fingers twine in his ceremonial jacket. He couldn’t help tilting his head just a little and took advantage of the soft mew to slip his tongue forward and touch Merlin’s lips. When his partner shifted, he found himself holding on a little tighter, unwilling to let that addicting mouth leave him. There was a moment of breath, the slightest opening, and he eased his tongue into that hot cavern. It was passionate and he lost himself in the sensations until he heard the clearing of a throat nearby.

Arthur actually considered ignoring the soft hint and continuing, but he did pull away if only for Merlin’s sake. Merlin just seemed so…innocent and he just didn’t know how far his experience went. Besides, it was only supposed to be for show. He wasn’t supposed to enjoy it like this, wasn’t supposed to want to, to want _more_.

Instead he kissed Merlin’s knuckles and chuckled at the red on his friend’s cheeks before turning to the crowd. As they began to chant ‘Long live the consort!’ he couldn’t help but think he had made the right decision.

-0-

Merlin was more relaxed at the feast, laughing and joking with the knights as he watched. Lancelot caught his eye and he leaned over so they could speak without drawing attention. “Did you need something, Lancelot?”

“No. I was just marveling at how happy you both seem. When we suggested this, you both acted as if there was going to be a funeral.”

He cast a quick glance at his husband, but he was in animated conversation with Gaius and Percival and not paying any attention. Elyan was speaking with Gwen, who had avoided Arthur ever since they had broken off the engagement. Leon and Gwaine were paying attention, trying to listen and yet pretend they weren’t. They were quite bad at it.

“There are worse things than being married to Merlin.”

“I wouldn’t think there’s anything bad about it, given how you were kissing him a few hours ago.” Gwaine, it seemed, had reached his limit of refraining from speaking.

“Gwaine,” he muttered warningly.

“Come on, Arthur. It’s clear that—ow!”

Lancelot and Leon were glaring at him fiercely. “Have you decided what you both will do about tonight?” Lancelot asked tactfully.

“No. I was intending to speak to him about it yesterday, but our conversation…turned in a different direction and I wasn’t able to. As far as I know, there will be no ‘tonight’.”

There was no further comment on it, though he could see in Gwaine’s eyes he wanted to. He straightened up and turned just in time to catch Merlin’s eye. He could see the shadows, the play of light, in his eyes and he found himself lost just a little. His left index finger felt too light without the heavy material weighing on it and his fingers eased over to where it was settled on Merlin’s hand. His thumb caressed it and before he knew it, Merlin had turned his hand and they were meeting palm to palm.

Feeling awkward at holding his partner’s hand, as this still was his best friend that teased him even more than Gwaine, he turned back to the room in general…but couldn’t bring himself to let go.

After another hour, he stood up and made their excuses. On this kind of night, they weren’t expected to stay long at the feast. Merlin’s belongings had been dropped off that morning, a small pile of stuff in the corner that hadn’t had a chance to be put away. There was an awkward moment as they shared a look before Arthur retreated behind the changing curtain.

“A-Arthur…”

“Yes, Merlin?”

“What are… I mean…”

Normally he’d tease him, make him say what he meant, but not tonight. “What do you want?”

“I don’t know!” was spat in frustration at him. Arthur listened quietly as he divested himself of the heavy cloak and jacket. “I don’t know what I want! I mean, I’m sure you’d rather not—”

“Don’t assume anything. You don’t know what I want out of this,” he interrupted, clenching his fist in his shirt. Merlin couldn’t possibly know how conflicted he felt, how he both wanted and didn’t want, and how guilty it made him. It made him feel as if he was taking advantage of the situation… “If you wanted it, I could give it to you.”

He threw off his shirt and shoes and shifted into his black sleep pants before he came back out. Merlin was still standing there, completely dressed, but his fingers were playing with the cloak. There was something so…cute and arousing about it that he reminded himself yet again that this wasn’t a traditional marriage and he had never thought about him like that before and…

“Well…what do _you_ want?” Merlin countered.

“Don’t twist it around, Merlin.”

“…You want to? With _me_?”

Arthur finally looked away. “It wouldn’t be difficult for me to hold you, Merlin. I’ve been with men before, far more than women given the risk of pregnancy. But I entered into this union to protect you and I won’t…take advantage of the situation.” He gestured to the sleeping screen. “Get undressed.”

Merlin dove behind it and his words seemed to come easier once there was a barrier between them. As if not being able to look at him made it easier to talk. “…You said you were still marrying out of love…”

“Yes.”

“But—”

“I don’t know what this is, Merlin!” he snapped, running his hand through his hair. “So stop asking me! I don’t know if it’s what I felt for Gwen, or something different! All I know is that I _like_ kissing you and I want to hold you…but at the same time I feel conflicted because I don’t think I had these thoughts before. I never viewed Gwen as a…friend before, I just felt for her. Yet you’re my…best friend and yet I feel some of the things for you that I did for her. I don’t know…what to do about this.”

Merlin stepped out from behind the changing curtain in some loose pants and Arthur made a mental note to update the man’s wardrobe now that they were married. “…So we’re in the same boat.”

Arthur rubbed his forehead and sighed before crawling into bed. “Sleep, Merlin. We’ll figure it out soon. Right now, I’m just exhausted.”

His former manservant seemed to hesitate a little, rocking back and forth on the balls of his feet, before he finally crawled into bed with him. The fire was already lit and there were little ‘gifts’ around the room clearly meant to accommodate an eventful night in bed, but Arthur just turned his head and buried his face in the pillow, trying not to face it. After a minute he felt Merlin’s hands on his back, lightly rubbing at his shoulders.

“…I’m sorry.”

“If I hear you apologize one more time…” He sighed. “Is it so bad to be married to me?”

“I don’t know. I’ve only been married to you for a few hours. If you’re anything like you usually are, probably.” Merlin laughed a little at him and he couldn’t stop his own small chuckle. “What you did… I don’t think I can ever…repay you. At the same time, I feel as if I stole your future.”

“You didn’t steal anything, Merlin. Look, everything might have changed, but you need to understand that I did this because I wanted to and you shouldn’t feel…pressured. Out there we have to be a loving pair, but it doesn’t have to be in here. You do understand that, don’t you Merlin?”

There was a moment of silence before the soft reply came. “Yeah, I do.”

“Good. Now shut up and go to sleep.”

Merlin didn’t argue for once and instead eased down under the sheets. “…Night, Arthur.”

“Night, Merlin.”

Well it wasn’t as bad as it could have been…

-0-

Merlin woke up slowly for once and amazingly warm. His eyelids eased open and for a moment he thought everything that had happened was a dream, then everything came into focus. Definitely not a dream, he noted, as he looked around Arthur’s room. There was something heavy around his waist and he shifted, noting that the warmth was concentrated at his back. Biting his lip, Merlin looked over his shoulder to find that somehow in the night, Arthur had rolled over and spooned at his back, his arm thrown over his waist to keep him close.

He gulped a little, but no one had entered and there was no knock on the door despite the lateness of the morning. He shifted just enough to lay on his back, but the arm kept him crammed close to Arthur’s chest. He had never thought his friend to be so possessive before, but he was, at least in sleep. His mind prodded him that he should get up and get Arthur his breakfast and then another part told him that he didn’t have to do that anymore because he was no longer a manservant.

That was one of the many things that they hadn’t taken one minute in the past two weeks to talk about and he cursed himself for it. How much of an idiot was he that he just let the issue go? What was he expected to do now, how was their relationship going to work, and perhaps most important of all, could what he valued as their friendship survive the current ambiguity they were in?

Arthur moved beside him and he turned to look at him just as his new husband’s eyes slid open. His hair was mussed as usual, but seeing it from this perspective, it was actually pretty sexy to look at. “Morning, Arthur,” he muttered.

“Morning, Merlin.” His voice was roughened by sleep and he yawned, removing his arm to brush his hair out of his eyes.

He wasn’t even sure why he did it, but Merlin found himself leaning in and let their lips brush against each other lightly. They both froze as they realized just what he’d done and he couldn’t meet Arthur’s eyes. Instead he stared at the king’s shoulder, noting a scar left behind on one of his many outings. Once again they were both impressively bad at confronting big issues so their conversation last night was unfinished and nebulous. He didn’t know where he stood.

Fingers dove into his hair, tilting his head up. He let out a mew of surprise as suddenly Arthur’s lips latched onto his and his tongue took advantage of his slightly open mouth. It was like he was pouring out his confusion and his wants right into Merlin and he moaned softly, one hand easing slowly up his arm and to his shoulder. It only seemed to encourage the king, who moved to lean over Merlin, half on top of him.

His stomach trembled just a little as he felt a hand resting on his bare skin, caressing in a gentle, soft fashion as a direct contrast to the fierce kissing. Fingers were easing further down and he felt himself hardening, whimpering once, maybe twice—only for Arthur to abruptly break the kiss and move back, as far back as he could, until he moved to sit on the edge of the bed with his back to Merlin.

“Arthur?”

“What?”

“What was that?”

“That was me barely controlling myself. Merlin, until we figure this out, no kissing in private.”

His first instinct was to argue, but he stopped. He really didn’t know what he wanted out of this arrangement, much less Arthur, and he was the one that had forced his friend into this situation to start with. If Arthur said no kissing in private, then they wouldn’t. “Okay,” he muttered. Desperate for a change of subject, he asked, “So what am I expected to do now?”

He could almost hear the blink from his friend, as if it had never occurred to him, before he stood up and went to his wardrobe. “You’ll join me in court. I forgot in all the wedding planning that you’ll have to have a better selection of clothes, so right now, just borrow some of mine.”

“Whoa, hold on, Arthur. What’s wrong with what I have?”

“They’re not fit for a consort, Merlin. You’re my husband now, you have to at least attempt to not wear clothes that have more holes it in that your pitiful lies to explain your magic two years ago. I won’t stop you if you want to still work as Gaius’ assistant, so long as you evenly divide your time between there and court with me.”

“Why does it feel as if I’m still your manservant?” he complained, but he couldn’t really argue too much. It was better than mucking out the stables or doing his dirty laundry.

Arthur flashed him a smile, but it was hard to tell if it was pleased or if it was more of a smirk. He went with smirk. “Well as soon as I remove the ban against magic and you come out in public about it, you’ll be court sorcerer too and then have enough duties to keep you as busy as before, if not moreso.”

“You’re evil.”

“And you love me for it.”

The words seemed to come so easily to Arthur and Merlin wondered if he didn’t realize just what he’d said. It was something that they might have said in their banter before, but ever since the past two weeks, something like that had taken on undertones. He gulped a little.

“Get dressed. Are you going to court with me or to see Gaius?”

“Gaius. He needs me to grab some more herbs.”

“Fine. Be _careful_ when you go out.” Arthur frowned as he pulled on his final jacket. “Maybe I should send Leon with you.”

Merlin rolled his eyes as he crawled out of bed and went hunting through Arthur’s clothes for something to wear. “I’m capable of taking care of myself.”

“With magic. The last thing I want is you being attacked by some still believing our marriage is wrong _or_ because of the rumors and them being shown they’re true.”

“ _Arthur_ , I’m going with Gaius! Who’s going to attack him?”

The king was eying him, but seemed to finally relent. “Fine, but if you’re not seen in three hours’ time, I’m sending out the knights for you.”

“Geez, fine. You weren’t this overprotective before. In fact, you weren’t protective at all before unless someone was trying to torture me!”

“Yes I was, you just never saw it. Now, be careful,” Arthur ordered with a dark look before leaving the room.

“…Idiot,” he muttered at the man’s back, but there was a smile he just couldn’t make go away on his lips.


	4. Chapter 4

He almost chose not to go into court when they returned back from Camelot, but Gaius had given him a _look_ that said ‘I know you’re avoiding him’. It wasn’t as if he was doing it on purpose, but he just didn’t know how to handle everything right then. Yet ignoring it wasn’t going to make the problem go away. So he squared his shoulders and nodded at the knights as he entered. His entrance caught everyone’s attention despite being deep in conversation and he resisted the urge to wince.

Just as Merlin was about to decide to stand behind Arthur’s throne as usual, he realized that a slightly smaller one had been placed next to it. It took an embarrassing minute to realize that was where he was supposed to sit. He swallowed heavily and made his way over.

“Merlin,” Arthur greeted, standing up. His arm slid around Merlin’s waist as he reached the thrones and their lips met in what he assumed the king wanted as a soft, quick kiss. It wasn’t really, but he found himself not exactly complaining. No tongues were involved this time, but it felt like a near thing. He could almost feel the struggle between them to hold back.

It was short, though, and Arthur sat down as if it was an everyday occurrence. Merlin dropped down next to him in his own seat, but as soon as he did, his hand was lightly grabbed the man next to him. He glanced at him out of the corner of his eye, but Arthur was focused on what an adviser was saying. For a long minute all Merlin could feel was his own beating heart before it slowly eased down to a normal rhythm. This was going to be normal; this was a necessity. They had to look like they were in love and it had to be obvious considering that three weeks ago, he was going to marry Gwen and everyone in the palace had seen their budding relationship.

Somewhere along the way in the incredibly boring prattle he had never paid attention to before as manservant and didn’t pay attention to now as consort, Arthur’s thumb had begun to lightly move back and forth over Merlin’s hand. He didn’t honestly seem to be aware of doing it, his full focus on what was being said. He couldn’t help but admire him, because Arthur had changed since the bratty prince he had met and had truly grown into an impressive king.

“One final issue, My Lord,” one of the more wizened men said.

“Yes?”

His eyes glanced at Merlin and then back to the King. “It is…customary to send out letters to our allies regarding your new…status as a married man. It usually includes the name of the princess, but in this case, it might be better to have no name—”

“No. Put Merlin’s name there. Who I marry should not affect our treaties and if it does, then it signifies greater concerns than I realized.”

“And the issue of heir, Your Highness?”

He blinked by the way Arthur stiffened. Had they had this argument before? By the way Arthur was deliberately not looking at him, this was not a discussion that he wanted Merlin present for, which made Merlin all the more determined to stay. “I thought I made it clear that discussion was over.”

“I’m afraid it isn’t that simple. This…young man cannot give you an heir to the throne and plans must be in place for that.”

Merlin blinked, a bit dumbfounded. It honestly hadn’t occurred to him about children. He’d been more worried about Arthur and Gwen’s relationship, about his magic use, about his friends’ happiness…but the idea that Arthur needed an _heir_ had just passed him by. It was even more proof that he wasn’t the right choice for the king to marry…

Arthur’s fingers clenched around his hand and he glanced over only to find those blue eyes fixed on him. What hadn’t occurred to him must have to Arthur. In fact, all of these things that had never crossed Merlin’s mind had clearly already been thought of by the king himself. With magical situations, with how to keep Arthur safe, he was always thinking, but he was lost in political situations like this. Maybe it was that that made them such a good pair because Arthur had already thought of all of that long before he did.

“If necessary, I will appoint someone as my heir in a few years. It’s hardly an urgent matter at the moment.”

“But sire, you would let the Pendragon line die—”

“Enough. Court is over.” Arthur stood, hand still holding Merlin’s and tugging him up and out of the room.

“You didn’t tell me.”

“Tell you what?”

“About the heir thing,” he said as allowed himself to be pulled to wherever Arthur was going.

“There’s too many other issues of greater concern at the moment.”

Merlin planted his feet, forcing Arthur to stop and look at him. “Arthur,” he said seriously, “we need to talk about this.”

“What’s to talk about, Merlin?”

“About the fact that you need an heir. About the fact that no matter what you say, I’m willing to bet my mag—my _life_ that you want children. I can’t give you that…naturally.”

The pause and the word made Arthur’s eyes widen and then narrow. He leaned in until they were almost breathing the same air and hissed angrily, “ _No_ , Merlin. I don’t care what’s in your head, you will _not_ use magic to make a child. We _both_ know what I was told by Yggraine and we both know that it was _true_.”

“But Arthur, you want children and you want an heir! If I can give you that, regardless of what happens to me—”

“Don’t you even dare, Merlin! Don’t tell me what I want and if you so much as even _consider_ it… We both know you can’t create life without death even in the old religion and I will _not_ lose you. Do you understand me, Merlin?”

“I understand,” he muttered in frustration.

“ _Do you_?”

“Yes!” he spat, jerking his hand back and crossing his arms over his chest sulkily.

“This discussion is closed.”

 _For now_ , he thought to himself as Arthur stalked off.

-0-

The simmering tension between them didn’t ease in the next few days. In fact, it only seemed to increase. Merlin found it impossible to resist every time they kissed. Since Arthur had still banned them from kissing in private, it was like they were making it worse. More than once servants giggled as they walked past the two of them and he had honestly wondered if they were going to give the court a heart attack the next time he’d walked in from a few hours apart.

“Here, bring this to Arthur,” Gaius told him, handing him a small jar of ointment.

“What’s this for?”

“Liniment for sore muscles. He hasn’t been training the knights now as much as he was as prince, which means he’ll be sore today when he’s done.”

Merlin didn’t really complain about going to the training grounds, as he hadn’t had as much chance to see the knights as when he’d just been Arthur’s manservant. Things had been so much easier then, he thought. He hadn’t had to wake up to Arthur’s sleeping face, or fall asleep against his admittedly handsome figure. Nor had he had these blasted, plaguing thoughts that were inexorably squashing the guilt.

As he rounded the corner into the field, he watched as Arthur disarmed Lancelot. Sweat was beading their faces and he blessed that since it was nearing winter, there was a cool breeze. Despite that, he could only imagine how hot they must be under the layers of armor. Lancelot was smiling as he bowed a bit, gracefully conceding defeat.

“Well look what the cat dragged in!” Gwaine said as he spotted Merlin and waved with his sword.

Arthur turned and Merlin shook the bottle he held by way of greeting. “I don’t miss fixing any of your armor,” he said with a grin as he approached the group.

“You know that was your favorite task,” the king all but purred, wrapping his arm around Merlin’s waist and drawing him close for a kiss. Really, it was just Lancelot, Percival, Gwaine, Leon, and Elyan; they had no need to do this in front of them because they knew the truth, yet the thought of not doing so never crossed his mind.

He moaned a little at how close they were pressed together, lightly wrapping his arms around Arthur’s shoulders without thinking about it. The jar dangled perilously from his lax fingers, focused more on giving entrance to his partner’s tongue than making sure it didn’t fall and break. He felt the flat side of the sword pressing against his side a bit as Arthur’s other arm went around his back. The hand that had been slung around his waist shifted, gripping his rear and he let out a little gasp of delight.

There was no clearing of throats, no prodding, no comments, but Merlin slowly became acutely aware that they were being watched. Finally, both needing to breathe and because embarrassment was breaking through a sudden passion, he ended the kiss. It didn’t seem to register to Arthur, though, whose lips immediately latched onto the side of his neck, nipping at a cord of muscle under his mouth.

“Arthur,” he muttered in faint warning. Gwaine had an amazingly stupid smile over his face and in fact, all of them were looking a bit…proud? Pleased? They were talking amongst themselves, as if it was it was completely normal for the king to be currently sucking a soft bruise on his husband’s neck. In public. In the middle of training.

“What?” Arthur mumbled before lifting his head as he realized what Merlin had been trying to tell him. “Oh.”

“Don’t mind us, continue if you want,” Gwaine said with a soft laugh. Reluctantly Merlin dropped his arms and was it his imagination that Arthur seemed just as unwilling to let him go? “The sexual tension out here could be cut by a knife.”

Merlin blushed heavily and stepped back several times so that he wasn’t in Arthur’s grabbing range. The guilt that he hadn’t realized had almost disappeared came flooding back as he remembered that it wasn’t supposed to be him that Arthur should be kissing. Arthur shouldn’t be holding back his affection, his need, and it certainly shouldn’t be _him_ that was the focus of that. He clenched his hand on his pants and berated himself mentally that he hadn’t figured out how to make amends with Gwen, how to fix their stiff and stilted conversations. It was getting better the more they did it, but it would take time and here he was just leaning back and basking in these sensations that he had done nothing to deserve and—

“Merlin?”

His head jerked up at Arthur’s worried voice and even the other knights were looking concerned. “I’ll just…put this in the barracks then. For you. To use. Later. When you’re ready.”

He turned and all but ran, stepping into the darkened building and away from the sun and eyes. It had felt so right out there, kissing Arthur and being around the knights. Like this was how life was meant to be, that he had found a place he _truly_ fit in. Yet he was cruelly reminded that this wasn’t supposed to be _his_ place. It was supposed to be Gwen in his spot. As he imagined her where he’d just been, he looked at the image in his mind and realized nowhere in there had he put himself. They would welcome him, they would never ask him to leave, but somehow, with the prophecy ringing in his ears, he had assumed that once Arthur had been made king and had a lovely queen and loyal knights that his job was over.

He heard the door open behind him and hands grip his arms lightly. “Merlin?”

“What are you doing here?” he asked. “You should be out there, training the knights.”

“They can spare me for a few minutes. What’s the _matter_ , Merlin? You went from looking as if you had been handed heaven then watched as it was yanked from you and shattered.”

Merlin couldn’t turn around and instead stared the swords hung on the walls and racks. “It should have been Gwen out there with you. That was…her place and I took it from her. I took it from you. She should be making you happy.”

“You’d better be insinuating that you make me happy too or I really _will_ make you clean out the stables,” Arthur threatened, pulling him back. Merlin felt the chain links of the armor against his back and he took a deep breath. “I’m not…upset at the situation, Merlin. In fact, I’m kind of amazed to admit that this is working. I feel…so comfortable with this arrangement that it amazes me that we haven’t been like this for years.”

“You still never listen to me.”

“And I probably never will,” Arthur teased in his ear, hands running up and down Merlin’s arms like he would stroke a skittish horse. A soft kiss was left at the juncture of his neck and shoulder and he shuddered just a little. “There is only one thing that upsets me right now.”

“What’s that?”

“You feeling like this. You being upset. I _hate_ that look on your face like a few minutes ago.”

“What look is that?”

“That sad look of yours you have when you think I’m not looking and something bad has happened to me. That crushed look that’s all for me and not one tear for yourself. I’m the one that proposed this situation. I’m the one that insisted on it. You were against it at the start and if the person that started this and that you believe has given up the _most_ for it is happy with the arrangement, then there is absolutely _no_ reason that you should still be upset. Understand?”

Finally Merlin turned his head to look at Arthur. There was a soft look in his blue eyes, the appearance of maturity that he had sworn would never be there when they first met. “Yeah,” he whispered softly as their lips just lightly brushed over each other. Not a real kiss, they were in private, but close enough.

“I order you to be happy, Merlin,” Arthur murmured at him, hands slowly going down his arms to his hips and resting there.

“Not your manservant anymore,” he muttered back, “but I’ll do my best, sire.”

“Good.”

There was a moment of silence and just before Merlin broke and leaned forward to kiss him, Arthur pulled away. He cleared his throat and gave him a long look before leaving the barracks and going back to the field. Merlin honestly felt sorry for whoever was up next, because he had a feeling that they were going to be in for a long, brutal fight.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is not worksafe!

“Merlin?”

He blinked and rubbed his eyes as he was nudged awake from his little catnap against a tree. Lancelot was leaning over him and he looked around the man to see the rest of the knights watching. His friend waved them on and they nodded, going into the barracks. Clearly about two hours had passed if they were done and he had to wonder where Arthur was. Maybe he had been called away?

“Lancelot.” Merlin pushed himself to a sitting position. “All done for the day?”

“Yes.” The knight shifted and sat down next to him. “So how are things going with Arthur?”

“We’re…fine, I guess. We have our…arguments and we just keep getting tongue-tied over stuff.”

“Over what?”

“Well, like what I’m supposed to be doing now, that kind of thing. We try to nail down concrete things and…can’t.”

Lancelot watched him for a minute before asking, “And…in private? You two were very…close on the training field.”

He blushed fiercely and chewed on his lip, but decided to talk about it finally. He’d tried several times to air out his confusion with Gaius, who was always willing to listen, but somehow the words failed. He felt too embarrassed to talk about things like this with a man who was like his father. It would be like asking his mother about sex. He just couldn’t do it, bring it up himself, and Gaius was too nice about making him sit down and say anything.

“It’s…getting worse, Lancelot. Arthur refuses to let us kiss in private because he says that he…doesn’t know if he can control himself, but it’s hardly any better in public. As soon as we do kiss, I forget the world even exists. I shouldn’t…feel like this, but…”

“Feel like what?”

He glanced at the corner of his eye and while he appreciated the other knights very much, there was something about Lancelot’s calm, nonjudgmental nature that enabled him to be honest. “That I want…more.”

Lancelot’s eyes didn’t widen. Instead, he nodded, as if he had suspected it for a while. “What does Arthur want?”

“He won’t tell me. He just keeps telling me that he could if I want it, but I don’t know if that’s his way of telling me that he wants it too, or just that he can if I want it, but he doesn’t.”

The knight tilted his head for a moment in thought and said, “Do you want to know what I think? I know this isn’t any of my business, but if I can help even a little, I’d like to.”

“Please, go ahead. Can’t make it any worse than it is.”

“By the way Arthur holds you when you do kiss and how his eyes look for you in every room, I think he does want it, but he thinks he’s forced you into this and he’d be taking advantage of you to say he wants it. I think he’s afraid that you’d agree because _he_ wants it if he told you that, out of guilt or obligation.” Lancelot rested his hand on Merlin’s shoulder. “There is always the possibility that I could be wrong, but one thing I do know for certain is this: he will _never_ make the first move in this situation, so if you want to have that kind of relationship, it’s up to you to tell him.” A soft smile was thrown his way and Merlin caught himself thinking ‘ _if I didn’t have Arthur_ …’

“Do you think… Arthur said when he asked me to marry him that he’d be marrying for love, just not a romantic love.”

“I…” Lancelot hesitated for the first time and clasped his hands in his lap.

“What?”

“I have had my suspicions before this was ever broached that he might have…feelings for you that he wasn’t recognizing, but even if I’m wrong and it was merely a friendly love, I think it might have changed along the way. Regardless of whether I’m right or wrong about what _kind_ of love it is between you, it is definitely love and a strong one at that. He does _love_ you, Merlin.”

“You’re no help,” he teased with a weak smile and Lancelot laughed. “You’re supposed to have all the answers, you’re a knight right?”

“I didn’t think there was a part in the code of the knights that said we were supposed to know everything.”

“With the way that Arthur talks, you’d think it’s rule number one. _He_ certainly thinks he knows everything.”

“Then why don’t you ask _him_ these questions? I think if anyone knows the answers, it would be him after all.” He rolled his eyes at the knight’s grin and allowed himself to be pulled to his feet. “Now, I think it’s best you find your husband before he comes out looking for you, finds us here, and assumes all manner of bad things.”

Merlin laughed. “What, you think _Arthur_ would be jealous? Over me?”

“I think you don’t understand just how jealous he can be with you,” Lancelot told him seriously as they headed toward the palace. “Arthur is a man in love like anyone else and he was already possessive of you before.” He tilted his head. “It’s like you were made for each other or something.”

He bit his lip as he thought back to Kilgharrah’s comment about them being two sides of the same coin. He had always assumed that that meant they were spiritually the same person in a sense, rather than anything possibly romantically inclined. Lancelot gave his shoulder an encouraging squeeze as he headed to the barracks and Merlin went into the palace. He knew that it was likely Arthur would be eating dinner in his—their room, so he resisted the urge to the kitchens. He didn’t have to bring him his meals anymore.

Barely stopping himself from knocking out of nerves, Merlin just entered the room. Rather than where he had expected him to be—at the table or at his desk—Arthur was standing at the window and looking down at the grounds below. His clothes were different, more relaxed, and his hair was wet so he must have just bathed. “Arthur?”

“Did you have a good talk with Lancelot?”

Oh. Was this the jealousy Lancelot was talking about? “Yeah. I needed to…talk and I can’t really bring myself to tell it to Gaius.”

“And it was something you couldn’t say to me?”

As he was closer now, he could see the tension in Arthur’s back. “Well…we’d been trying, but we haven’t got anywhere with it.” He glanced at the table. “You didn’t touch the food. It’s probably getting cold now.”

“I lost my appetite.”

“ _You_ lose your appetite? Declare a state of emergency! The world is ending!” Merlin grinned. “Come on, Arthur, it was nothing. I was confused and I needed an outside opinion.” He hesitated, but reached out and ran his hands along that stiffened back. If Lancelot was right… _Please let him be right_ , he thought as he muttered, “You don’t have to be jealous.”

“I’m not jealous!” Arthur spat as he whirled around and Merlin squeaked as he found himself pressed up against the stone wall, trapped by his husband. “I’m _not_!”

“You are,” he argued back.

“There’s nothing to be jealous of!”

“Then let’s make it so there is.”

Arthur blinked, his irritation seeming to flee instead for confusion. “What?”

Merlin reached out more confidently than he felt and dragged Arthur close by his shirt. “Let’s give you a reason to be jealous,” he muttered before he, for the first time, initiated a real kiss. He didn’t count that time the morning after, he considered that just a light passing of lips, but this was different. As if it opened the floodgate, Arthur moved in like a hawk, pressing him even more firmly against the wall and easing his legs between the sorcerer’s.

The kiss was shorter than before, but no less passionate. Arthur seemed to struggle, managing to pull away, and muttered, “I said no kissing in private.”

“And I want you,” he argued back, hands still gripping the king’s shirt and stopping him from backing up.

“What?”

“Give me that wedding night. Right now.”

Arthur’s eyes went wide. “Do you know what you’re asking?”

“Gaius informed me in embarrassing detail how two men have sex. It was mortifying, thank you very much for _that_ awful reminder, so yes, I do know. I want you to do what you’ve been holding back doing, and do it now before we break and end up having sex in the middle of the hallway! There’s just one thing,” he added, seeing the increasing lust going through Arthur’s eyes.

“What?”

“I need to know how…you feel.”

“About what?”

“I’m not saying this because I feel I _should_ since we’re married. I need to know if you want it too.”

“…You idiot,” Arthur muttered, surging forward and kissing Merlin fiercely. He whimpered, wrapping his arms around those broader shoulders. “Yes, of course yes!”

Merlin smiled in between their kissing and this time didn’t feel embarrassed or awkward when he felt warmth begin to pool, his blood heading south. When his lips were bruised from all the kissing, he moaned and let his head fall back. Arthur didn’t seem to lose his stride, instead heading right back to the mark he’d made that afternoon and proceeded to make another right next to it.

Their hips were lightly rubbing together now and he could feel Arthur’s own clothed arousal. So Lancelot had been right: Arthur had been jealous, jealous over _him_ , and it sent a shock of excitement through his spine. “Arthur,” he moaned softly, feeling those hands sliding to his rear, then his thighs. “Arthur, I love you.”

The words just slipped out, like they were the most natural thing in the world. He almost didn’t realize he said them until Arthur paused. Lips ceased their movement on his neck, just resting in that one spot right over his heartbeat. He wondered for a minute if the king was counting his heartbeat, then realized he’d quickly lose count as it sped up in dread. A nervous fear began to thrum through his blood and he muttered, “I-I’m sorry, Arthur—”

Merlin squeaked as suddenly, without warning, he felt himself being lifted off the floor entirely. Arthur braced his arms under his rear and turned, and Merlin had a moment’s concern about the table still covered with food, but Arthur walked right past it. “Arthur?” He grunted as he was thumped onto the bed, a brief few seconds he was by himself before he had a human blanket over him.

“Shut up, Merlin. The only thing that should come out of your mouth is moans and those words again.”

He stared in surprise at the man above him and began to smirk. His fingers twined in a necklace Arthur had worn that day and tugged him further down. “Oh really? I won’t say what you want to hear until you tell me.”

“You should already know how I feel by now!”

“Pretend I don’t,” Merlin told him, because in truth, he still didn’t feel he knew. Sure Arthur had said he loved him, but Merlin, he now realized, meant those words in a very different sense. He loved him like Gwen had loved him.

Arthur growled low in his throat as their lips were centimeters from touching. “I love you, goddamn it. I love you, Merlin!”

“In what way?”

“In the way that matters! In the way that I’m going to rip your clothes off in the next few seconds and show you just how much! In the way that makes me see red when you and Lancelot are just talking! In the way that I want to make you know exactly what two husbands do in marriage!”

Merlin blushed as red as a cherry, even more so because not a trace of that color was staining Arthur’s cheeks as he boldly said words that would have closed Merlin’s throat. “R-Really?”

“Merlin…!”

“Sorry!” he said, feeling a silly, stupid smile coming to his face. He couldn’t help a delighted laugh, and he mentally braced himself for the teasing that would come ahead.

But it didn’t. Instead, Arthur seemed to pause in his intent to ravish and ran his fingers along the edge of Merlin’s smile. “This is what I want to see out of my husband. I want to see _this_ expression all the time. Don’t you ever show me that look from this afternoon again.”

“I’ll try not to,” he whispered, running his hand down Arthur’s clothed back. “So are you going to show me what it’s like to be pampered by a king?”

“I’ll show you so much that you won’t walk tomorrow,” Arthur murmured, voice dark with promise. “And I won’t let you touch your new clothes. Or any clothes for that matter.”

Merlin shivered and watched as those deft fingers pulled off his belt and then his shirt, throwing them to the side. “Merlin,” the king growled a little before leaning down and latching onto his nipple. His teeth nipped just a bit and Merlin let out a soft cry, easing his fingers into that damp blonde hair. For a moment he just basked in the sensations before he slid his hands down to Arthur’s belt, managing to loosen it before his hands were swatted away. “I thought you wanted to be pampered.”

“I do,” he whined at the light bite on his chest.

“Then _stop_ doing what you’re doing. Just let me handle everything.”

Merlin whimpered as Arthur kissed his way to his other nipple and his hands began to tug down his pants. He moaned out his husband’s name, kicking off his boots when he felt the material begin to pool around his ankles. Almost immediately he felt the roughened calluses of Arthur’s hands holding and stroking his thighs, so close to where he wanted them and yet so far away. Finally Arthur eased up onto his knees and looked down, as if to admire his handiwork. “I’ve wanted to look at you naked for weeks.”

“I refuse to believe you didn’t at least peek,” he muttered with a faint blush.

“Did you?” Arthur countered with a slow smirk. “If you had, you might have seen me in a compromising position.”

He gulped. “You…”

“Did I touch myself with you in mind? Yes, I did. It’s amazingly hard to hold back with you around.”

Merlin’s light blush had turned full blown then, but his eyes were glued to Arthur as he pulled off his shirt. It went the same way as the rest of Merlin’s clothes and he gulped, finally allowing himself to _look_ at the muscled torso of his husband. It sent a soft throb through his erection, something Arthur noticed and smirked at. “You like what you see?” When Merlin didn’t, couldn’t, answer, Arthur added, “Answer your king, Merlin.”

“Yes,” he muttered, voice coming out as a strangled sound.

As if to reward him, Arthur reached out and ran his fingertips along the underside of his arousal and Merlin gasped, letting his head fall back against the pillows. Arthur did it again and he moaned more loudly than he was intending to. It was only when the man stopped that he lifted his head again. The king had reached over and grabbed a jar nearby. His eyes narrowed. “Isn’t that the liniment Gaius made for your ‘sore muscles’?”

“It can be multipurpose,” was the immediate response as he gathered some on his fingers. “Do you want to be on your front?”

“What?” he asked, blinking.

“I shall assume, then, that Gaius told you only the basics. I can take you from your front or your back, or you can ride me. For tonight, let’s stick with the first two. Do you want to be facing me or not?”

If he wasn’t watching how much Arthur was holding back by the slight trembling of his fingers in lust, Merlin might have been angry at how calm and composed he sounded while he felt wrecked with desire. “I want to see you,” he told him bluntly back.

Arthur blinked, as if he hadn’t quite been expecting that, but he began to smile. Apparently that was what he wanted to hear, but didn’t want to let Merlin know. “You take so much work,” he half-complained but grinned at his partner and spread his legs a bit wider.

“Me? Not nearly as much as looking after _you_ ,” was bantered back at him. The words were a distraction that he didn’t notice the finger sliding inside until he reached the first digit. “Relax, Merlin. Keep yourself relaxed.”

“Easy for you to say,” Merlin muttered as he shifted at the uncomfortable sensation.

“I love you.”

The words he was convinced he would never get used to washed over him, surprising him enough that it allowed Arthur to push the rest of that finger up to the knuckle. He gasped, squirming, and Arthur leaned down to kiss him, humming in his ear a bit before nipping at his neck. “Why did I agree to this again?” he complained.

“I’ll show you why in just a second,” Arthur promised him, easing his finger back out and sliding in a second one. They were moving, lightly scissoring him and Merlin growled a little.

“Arthur…”

“Just give me a second to find it.”

“Arthur…!”

But then Arthur shifted, twisted his hand just so, and Merlin cried out in surprise. It was pleasure mixing with the pain he felt and he shuddered. The king was smirking down at him and touched that spot again, making Merlin gasp and see stars. “Good enough reason?”

Merlin moaned in answer, shifting his hips into the hand. “Sh-Shut up,” he stuttered as he felt the pleasure begin to relax his muscles for him and allowing a third finger to enter. Gently Arthur began to thrust them and he groaned deep in his throat.

“I said I only want to hear moans out of you,” Arthur whispered in his ear and Merlin turned his head, kissing him fiercely in retaliation. He didn’t need to seduce him any further, didn’t he know he already had everything that _was_ Merlin?

He let out a whimper of protest when Arthur pulled his hand away. “Do you still want to do this? This is the now or never point.”

“God, Arthur, just do it before I lose my mind!”

“I could argue that you’ve already lost it,” Arthur muttered and kicked off his pants.

“You make me go crazy and I don’t know if I want to strangle you or kiss you!”

“I’ll take that as a compliment.” Arthur coated himself in the salve and pulled Merlin’s hips up, easing his legs up to his shoulders. “Tell me again.”

“I love you,” Merlin replied instantly, but it ended on a yell as Arthur eased himself in slowly at the last word. “Stop…using words…as a distraction!” His eyes glowed gold for a minute and fire suddenly flared in the fireplace before he could stop it.

Arthur paused, staring at the sudden flames in caution. “Merlin…”

“S-Sorry, I didn’t mean to. Didn’t think that would happen. I-I’ll try not to.”

“I suppose it’s all right in just our room like this, but try not to accidentally decapitate me or something.”

“Like I could. My magic likes you.”

Arthur turned his attention back to the man panting beneath him. “Your magic _likes_ me?”

Merlin yelled a little as the king began to move forward again, slowly but with purpose. “Y-Yes!”

“What else likes me? Do your body like me?”

“Arthur!” he complained as the man finally settled completely inside and paused, letting him manage the painful sensations.

“What?”

“Don’t…pretend innocence!”

“I like to hear you talk, even if it’s nonsense. I must really love you if I do that.”

“Stop making fun of me!”

“I’m not,” Arthur told him, this time voice serious. “I’m honestly not. I’m telling you the truth: I like to hear you talk. I find myself listening for your voice constantly.”

Merlin met those soft blue eyes and he smiled a little when he saw that he actually was serious. His hands slid up those muscled arms to his equally firm back. Maybe he was too indulgent of Arthur; this was only going to make him worse, but he found that he couldn’t stop himself. “I shouldn’t be, but…I think I’m really happy right now.”

“Why shouldn’t you be?” Arthur asked as he moved back and gently thrust inside again. Merlin moaned deep in his throat and lightly wrapped his legs around his partner’s waist. “Is this about what you talked about this afternoon?”

“Maybe a little,” he admitted.

Arthur softly growled at him and slid one hand into Merlin’s hair, holding his head still. “If it takes me ten years, I will break you of the thought that you don’t deserve this.” Their lips met in a crash of passion and the king’s hips stuttered once before moving again, this time at a faster pace. “God, you’re tight, Merlin! Don’t…talk anymore, just let me…hear your sounds.”

It was one order that Merlin was willing to follow. It took a minute, but eventually he managed to catch the rhythm of his husband’s hips and then it was pure pleasure. Every thrust made his nerves scream and Arthur only encouraged him to be louder. His eyes grew gold again, pillows flying everywhere as he arched with a soft yell. Fingers gripped him lightly, rubbing him softly, easing him down from the edge of climax and he whimpered as his fulfillment was pulled away.

“Shhh, trust me,” Arthur whispered in his ear and he nodded. His blunted fingernails dug into the corded muscles beneath the skin of his partner’s back and little shapes of dragons danced in the smoke above the fire. Merlin stared unseeing at the ceiling, head tilted back as Arthur left another mark, this time on the other side of his neck. His hand was rubbing softly over his flesh now, the up and down motions almost reverent. “I _want_ to pamper you.”

His eyes slowly closed as he let out a helpless whimper. Every stab of Arthur’s hips was pushing him further again and his toes curled in pleasure. He didn’t try to hold it back because he knew that if his husband didn’t want him to release, he’d stop him. This time, he didn’t; instead, he encouraged it, rubbing his thumb over Merlin’s tip.

Merlin let out a final scream as he gave in, feeling his body tense up and clamp around the flesh invading him. He heard a whispered ‘yes’ among other encouragements in his ear as he felt sticky wetness coat their stomachs. All he saw was light behind his eyes, heard items from the bedside table clatter to the floor, and felt an explosion of heat before it settled. His magic eased back from simmering at his fingertips, barely beyond his control. “Arthur,” he moaned, feeling the king pick up speed, the smooth motions becoming less coordinated. It wasn’t intentional that he clenched at a deep inward thrust, but it caused Arthur to freeze, let out a grunt, and he felt something cold spray inside.

The room was silent as they panted, the tension between them easing for the moment. Merlin only opened his eyes when he felt fingers run along his cheek, almost as if in silent question. He nuzzled his lips into the king’s palm and moaned a little in protest when he eased their bodies apart.

“Do you see why I had to control myself?”

“No,” Merlin said with a blunt moan. “Felt fantastic. Why’d you have to control yourself?”

Arthur stared at him before he burst out laughing. “God, I don’t know what to do with you Merlin.”

“I can think of a few things.”

“I bet you can, but let’s try not to overdo it. Last thing I want is to get a lecture from Gaius.”

Merlin rolled onto his side, looking at the still sitting king. “I think we need to make up for lost time.”

He grinned as Arthur leaned over with a smirk, fingers finding Merlin’s wedding ring and rubbing along it gently. “Oh? Did I make that good of an impression?”

“If I say yes, will you do it again?”

The smirk Arthur gave him was downright wicked. “Oh, I’m going to get lectured by Gaius,” he whispered and kissed Merlin fiercely.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to say thank you to all the supportive comments from those that love this story and past stories I’ve written. I’ve never said thank you to those that took the time to comment on how much they enjoy the stories, but I do appreciate every one.

He watched the play of light and muscles as he ran his hand along a slim back. Merlin was still sleeping and really, he doubted he could sit up right then, much less stand, so Arthur had decided that letting him stay in bed was probably the best course of action. There was a faint, soft moan as his hand reached the small of the man’s back and he felt his inner predator growl in interest. He tamped down his urges. Even if he didn’t have court today, Merlin was in no condition for anything.

Though privately he thought it was his own fault. Didn’t he know that provoking Arthur was only going to end in trouble for him? He smiled as, when he put his hand in Merlin’s hair, his head turned as if to follow the motions. Really, how besotted could a man be?

Sighing, as he really didn’t want to leave, Arthur stood up and straightened his coat one last time before quietly leaving the room. He had fully intended to have Merlin there with him that day for the meeting of the round table, but that appeared as if it wasn’t going to happen. It was still fairly early and only his closest friends were there when he arrived.

They shared a long look and Arthur frowned, crossing his arms. “What?”

“I take it you and Merlin worked something out last night?” Leon asked, voice sounding a tad hopeful.

His eyebrow rose. “You could say that.”

“Could you also say that if Merlin was a woman, he’d be pregnant by now?” Gwaine asked with a cheeky grin.

Arthur rolled his eyes, but he couldn’t bring himself to be angry at the man. Gwaine was just…Gwaine. “As I said, we’ve come to…an understanding.”

“I hope it’s a long-standing and beneficial one,” Percival said, taking his seat.

“I expect it will be.”

“So where is Merlin?”

He coughed a little at Elyan’s question, feeling a soft flush of heat on his cheeks. The main door opened, but he didn’t turned. “Merlin was…up late last night and he’s a bit…wore out.”

“Is he.”

Arthur flinched at that voice and turned to look at Gaius. Why did he always seem to have a disapproving expression on his face? There was snickering from the other knights and if he wasn’t mistaken, he swore he heard Elyan mutter something about father-in-law’s. He glanced at his friends, who couldn’t even pretend they weren’t watching with rapt attention and gave in, throwing up his hands in resignation. “Yes. He… Well, Merlin is very persuasive even when it’s against his own good.”

“I see.” Gaius sighed heavily. “How bad is he?”

“He’s sleeping right now, but I’m not sure he can sit when he gets up, at least for a few more hours.”

“When we’re through here, I’ll go see him. However, My Lord, Merlin has always been reckless. I would have expected you to have more sense, as you’re the one with more experience.”

He resisted glaring and struggled to hold off a flush of embarrassment. “I may have more experience, and I may be a king, but I’m also a man and not many can hold back when the person they love is crawling in their lap and begging for it,” he defended quietly. It was only after he spoke that he realized just what he’d said and he winced, this time actually blushing.

Yet what his friends latched onto was not his admission of their sexual activities. Gaius was smiling softly and when he turned, he spotted varying delighted looks on the knights’ faces. “I’m pleased to hear you have found happiness in your current situation, Your Highness,” Gaius said politely, but he could hear the warmth in his voice.

He sighed and nodded. “I don’t…really know how it happened.”

“Does it matter?” Lancelot said. “So long as you both are happy, then that’s the only thing that matters. I trust Merlin _is_ happy?”

“I think for the most part, yes, but there are times he grows upset with guilt. He still believes that because of his mistakes, he has taken something away from me. I’ve told him repeatedly that I’m content with the arrangement we had, and even happier after last night.”

“Give it time,” Gaius suggested after sharing a look with the other knights. “Merlin has always held onto perceived mistakes longer than most and you know how stubborn he is. Just keep reminding him that you’re happy and no one has been irreparably hurt and it will fade completely in time.”

Arthur was not a man that enjoyed being idle, or being unable to solve a problem with his hands right then, but he had no choice. Gaius was right about Merlin’s mental state and he’d just have to do what he could when it happened. The hall began to filter with other knights, ending the discussion, and Arthur took his place, beginning the meeting with a surprisingly light heart.

-0-

He found Merlin awake when he returned to his room to check on him in the afternoon. He had shifted from his stomach to his side and was reading a thick book. When he approached and peered down, he realized it was a tome of magic. Merlin looked up and smiled and Arthur blinked as his husband reached out immediately for him. He bent down at the urging and their lips met in a kiss that was laced with restrained passion.

A soft moan was dragged from him unwillingly and his hand found its way into dark hair, tilting Merlin’s head just so and giving in to the urge to plunder his mouth with his tongue. Merlin was whimpering in delight and Arthur was so close to deciding the rest of the day could handle itself and just slide into bed and…

He tugged on his vaunted self-control and restrained himself, pulling back from the intoxicating kiss despite the sorcerer’s sound of protest. “Finally up?” he muttered.

“Am now,” Merlin said with a grin and tugged Arthur again. He knelt on the bed, sharing another equally passionate kiss that had his hands gripping bare shoulders, then running down his back to his rear.

“Merlin,” he moaned in frustration as he felt arousal slowly begin to pump through his blood.

“Yeah?” By the smug tone in Merlin’s voice, he was very aware of what he was doing and how he was playing Arthur like a fiddle.

“You’re going to get me lectured again.”

Merlin was all lips by that point, nipping at his ear softly. He could never accuse his partner of not learning _quickly_ , but then he had a lot of repetition thanks to last night. “It’s not as if you were the only one.”

Finally Arthur managed to move away just enough that he could sit on the edge of the bed and wasn’t in immediate danger of pulling off the bedsheets and showing Merlin just what he did to him. “Gaius did say he was going to check on you.”

“He told me I overdid it.”

“Because you did.”

“You weren’t complaining. In fact, if I recall, you were in enthusiastic agreement.”

“And I’m going to tell you the same thing I told Gaius: I’m only a human man, how was I supposed to resist you?”

Merlin’s smile was bright and delighted at that, as if knowing that he had an effect on Arthur was a precious gift. Was Merlin so used to never getting anything for himself that when something like this happened, it was just so surprising? It was this reaction that made him want to pamper his friend.

“He said I should be fine in another hour or two.”

“Good because Bayard is coming to visit the day after tomorrow to congratulate me on our marriage and you’re going to be there. Your clothes are ready, they should be in the wardrobe.”

“I still like what I’ve got.”

“And it’s not befitting as my husband. I’m not saying get rid of them, Merlin, I’m saying you can’t wear them, at least in the palace.”

“Then let’s get out of the palace for a bit. We can go riding or a hunting trip, like we used to.”

“I think you’ve done enough riding for a few days,” he said with a smirk, watching as a flush went up Merlin’s cheeks. “But we will soon, I promise.”

As their conversation dwindled, Merlin reached out to grab his hand and kiss the ring that was on his finger. He had taken the band he’d had commissioned for Merlin as his own once he’d given his partner his mother’s. Lips nudged at it, giving a soft kiss. Arthur watched silently, seeing the adoration that had always been in Merlin and yet he had never realized was even there. Now that he thought back to it, Merlin had always been this way, always there for him and in his own way, affectionate. Now it seemed as if their marriage and new relationship had released what bindings there had been, and now there was no stopping him.

He shifted his hand, tilting Merlin’s chin up to look him in the eye. Merlin just stared back with a clear, happy gaze, and he could see every thought that seemed to go through his mind. There were no more secrets between them anymore and he found himself using that light grip on his consort’s chin to pull him closer just a little. “Maybe you really did cast a spell on me,” he murmured, brushing their lips together.

“If I did, it was by accident. I didn’t know the words.”

“Yes you did,” Arthur argued, seeing Merlin so trusting of whatever he chose to do. “You said them last night. Over and over. You’ve been saying it over and over for years and I just never saw it until now.”

“I love you,” Merlin whispered reverently.

“See? There you go again, repeating your spell.”

Merlin was smiling now and Arthur couldn’t resist when the man leaned back and pulled him with him. Their lips met and Arthur barely resisted using his tongue like his partner was encouraging him to do. “I’ll say it over and over to make sure I can keep you.”

“I was yours the moment you said it the first time and always will be.” He found himself kissing down that illegally long neck, showering attention on him, and if it hadn’t been for the fact that he accidentally knocked the spell book onto the floor, he didn’t know if he’d be able to stop. With a frustrated growl, he eased back up onto his hands. “I want nothing more than to make you writhe, but I can’t right now. Tonight, though… You’ll scream for me.”

Merlin shivered. “Yes, sire.”

Reluctantly he pulled away and got off the bed, taking a minute to adjust himself in his trousers, and left his room, trying to think of the most unarousing thing in the world.


	7. Chapter 7

Merlin really wanted to be anywhere but here right then. He had things to do, questions to ask Kilgharrah, but Arthur had made it clear he was supposed to be there to greet Bayard. Dressed in the finery as he was, and a long cape, he felt out of place. He’d probably get used to the clothes, in time, but it just wasn’t who he was. He glanced out of the corner of his eye at his husband next to him. At least Arthur wasn’t attempting to change him. He had insisted on an updated wardrobe and that was it. He wasn’t asked to learn etiquette or required to do things that he hadn’t done before. He was allowed to be the same as before, with the exception of a few times Arthur had asked for his presence.

Which made him all the more determined to solve Arthur’s little heir problem. There was no way he could convince the king to consider a surrogate and he couldn’t do the same spell on himself that had been used on Yggraine. Completely disregarding the fact that he didn’t remember what happened to the cup of life, he wasn’t even sure if he could cast the spell on himself. It didn’t exactly have a timer. So that left finding another solution and the only one he could think to ask would be Kilgharrah.

“Try not to look so distracted,” Arthur told him quietly and he jerked a little.

“What?”

“They’re about to enter the courtyard any minute, so could you possibly stop looking as if you’re contemplating running away?”

He grinned at Arthur. “I don’t know, maybe.”

The king rolled his eyes, but there was a slight smile on his face regardless as he struggled to keep his serious expression. The clopping of the horses’ feet on stone signaled the arrival of their guests and Bayard with a small contingent of soldiers and servants rounded the corner.

“King Bayard,” Arthur greeted as the man dismounted. “We’re honored by your visit.”

The man looked at Arthur and Merlin for a long minute before finally saying, “Well I had to meet the young man again that accused me of poisoning you years ago. I didn’t think I’d be congratulating you for _marrying_ him.”

“Is this a problem?” Arthur’s voice seemed calm and completely composed, but Merlin was used to the telltale signs around his eyes that said he was tense.

“If it’s a problem, then it’s yours,” the blunt king said. “It is of no concern of mine who you marry and what you do about an heir. Instead, we will celebrate your marriage.”

Arthur nodded and turned, slipping an arm possessively around Merlin’s waist. Servants broke from the crowd on the steps of the palace to take the horses and lead the guests to their chambers as Bayard himself accompanied them through the halls. “A feast will be held tomorrow night and we shall use your generous gift to us when the treaty was first signed.”

Merlin watched as Bayard stared in surprise. “I feared you had them melted down.”

“Why should I, when it wasn’t your or the cups’ fault? The workmanship is superb and it was a gift.”

“And of the poison?”

“The cup itself wasn’t tainted. Just the edge of it with an herb. The properties of it were enhanced with magic,” Merlin explained. “We removed it, that’s all.”

Bayard looked at them with what Merlin thought was new respect. “We had heard rumors in Mercia that you were in love with a servant and would marry one, but I thought they had said it was a woman.”

Merlin glanced at Arthur, but the king merely looked back at Bayard. “The rumors were mistaken then.”

So he wasn’t going to tell them about Gwen? In some ways, he understood. What happened was a very complicated situation and despite how things had turned out a few days ago, it didn’t change the initial reason for their marriage. At the same time, it bothered him that Gwen seemed to be glossed over.

“…Indeed.” Bayard turned the conversation then to policy and Merlin tuned it out. He didn’t ask to leave, nor did Arthur make him, even though he felt bored to tears. Finally he slipped off when the two kings were winding their conversation down and Bayard being shown his rooms.

He turned the corner and spotted a familiar back among the servants. Merlin bit his lip, but squared his shoulders and called, “Gwen!”

At the very least, Gwen turned and she actually smiled at him a bit. “Merlin. What are you up to?”

“I was…” He hesitated and Gwen seemed to get the idea.

“Walk with me.”

She led him into a rarely used corridor and Merlin made sure no one was around before he could answer. “I was going to see a friend about…a problem. Normally I go at night, but Arthur would notice if I’m not there.”

“Why can’t you tell Arthur?”

“He’d get angry at me. Really mad. Like lock me in a room for three weeks and not let me out mad.”

Her eyebrows lifted in surprise before they lowered in concern. “Merlin, what would you be doing that would make him that worried?”

Merlin found himself rubbing his hands together in nerves, but admitted, “Arthur…has a problem and I’m trying to fix it. It probably won’t be easy because fixing his problems never _is_ , but I’m prepared to do it.”

“Merlin… Prepared to do what?”

He had to hand it to her, she was patient and letting him dance around the subject as long as he wanted so long as he finally did say it. “Arthur needs an heir,” he blurted. “He’s saying he’ll just appoint someone in a few years to take his place, but I know that he wants to be a father.”

Gwen was staring at him, her face blank, and he wished desperately to know what was going on in her mind. “A surrogate?”

“He won’t consider it. He’s…being faithful.”

“Well I knew it was a long shot. Arthur has always been noble.” Her eyes widened. “You’re not considering using magic, are you?!”

“Yes. What else am I supposed to do when the conventional way isn’t possible?”

“Merlin, it’s impossible!”

Merlin shook his head. He was used to bending the world to his will. He was not used to having an impossible problem that he couldn’t solve in one way or another. Every challenge that he’d come across, he’d found a way to surpass. Oftentimes it meant using his magic, but so long as the problem was gone, did it matter how it was accomplished?

“That’s why I’m going to see that friend I mentioned. There is…a spell that…could be used to get someone pregnant, but it would require a sacrifice and that’s....”

“Out of the question,” Gwen told him without pause, a resolute look in her eyes. “You’re not going to do anything that would hurt yourself or worse. If you do, I’ll tell Arthur about this little idea of yours.”

He blinked. “But…”

“Arthur _loves_ you, Merlin. Even I can see that. And you’re my friend, do you really think I’m going to let you do something to get yourself hurt while trying to fix a problem in a way that Arthur doesn’t want you to? I swear, you two will be the death of me yet.”

Merlin smiled a little at her fondly exasperated expression and for the first time since Arthur had proposed to him, he felt hope that their friendship would endure. “I promise, what I’m going to try to do won’t involve anyone getting hurt or dying. I don’t even know if it’s possible yet.”

“Are you going to tell me what ‘it’ is?”

He hesitated, glancing around, but still no one was there. “I was going to ask if it was possible that… _I_ could give Arthur children.”

“Merlin…you’re a man.”

“I know.”

“You think you can turn into a woman?”

“Well, I’ve done it once before, but it was a bit uncomfortable and I’m not sure that the…ability I’d need as a female would actually work. It’s a temporary spell. It’s not like when I’d age myself, that’s still my body, just older. Being a woman isn’t my body.”

“…I don’t think I want to know when you’d need to be an old man,” Gwen decided. “So you think your friend can tell you a way that, as a man, you can have children without turning into a woman?”

Well when she put it like that… “Yes.”

“Do you need help? Should I come?”

Merlin chewed on the inside of his lip as he considered it. Clearly Gwen knew about his magic, but did she know he was a dragonlord? He didn’t want to bring her and then have her freak out on him, particularly since like most of Camelot, they’d been on the receiving end of Kilgharrah’s attack when he’d freed him. At the same time, she clearly did want to help. “You can…but I should probably warn you… My friend is a dragon.”

“A dragon?!”

“His name is Kilgharrah. I’m the last dragonlord.”

“Oh Merlin…”

“…What?” he asked cautiously, afraid of what would come out of her mouth. Would she say that she had never known him at all with all these secrets? That this was one secret too many?

“You must have been terrified for so long when Arthur’s father still ruled.”

Merlin relaxed a bit. “Not as much as I should have. It didn’t stop me from using my magic. I even saved his life a few times with it, not that he knew that.”

Footsteps passing nearby reminded them that they were still in public and didn’t have a lot of time. “Okay, let me get out of these noticeable clothes and I’ll meet you at the gates. Don’t tell anyone where we’re going.”

“Don’t forget to bring something to cover your head. You’re not so anonymous anymore, Merlin.”

Merlin grimaced, but nodded.

-0-

Gwen was indeed waiting for him when he reached the main gate to the city. He’d deliberately caught Arthur in a corner in the hallway after he’d changed and had gotten into an extended kissing session. It had frustrated and aroused his husband, but also made him late for his next meeting which meant he’d be less likely to notice when Merlin was gone.

If Merlin enjoyed what they had been doing, that was just a pleasant bonus.

“I promise, he’s not going to hurt you so you don’t have to be worried,” he told her as Gwen followed him to the clear he habitually called Kilgharrah to.

“It’s not him I’m worried about.”

Merlin smiled before looking at the sky and calling out. Gwen squeaked a little at how loud he was and the strange words, but she remained at his side. They waited a few minutes and soon enough, Merlin heard the sounds of wings beating in the air. Kilgharrah circled the clearing, taking note of Gwen, before he landed. “If it isn’t the new consort. I haven’t see you since before your wedding, Merlin.” Merlin blushed as Kilgharrah leaned his head down and sniffed him. “And I see you’ve chosen to consummate your marriage.”

He couldn’t look at Gwen, dared not to. Everyone else in the palace had never questioned that, but she and the knights had known the truth and that the marriage had been arranged for a purpose. He hadn’t wanted to tell her that they were actually sleeping together, didn’t want to upset her. In fact, he should be happy that she was even speaking to him as normal right then as only a month had passed since the engagement had been broken off.

“Why have you called me here, young warlock? In the afternoon, no less.”

“It was a risk I had to take. It’s too hard get out at night anymore.”

“Really. Should the Pendragons be known for their virility then?”

He turned a bright red at the teasing. “I called you here to ask you something.”

“As always. What do you want to know?”

“Is there a way for me to…have Arthur’s children?”

To his credit, Kilgharrah didn’t seem surprised. “There are many ways of creating life and some are non-magical. Why would you choose to ask me?”

“Because magic is my only option. Arthur won’t do any of the other non-magical things.”

“You already know of one method.”

“I don’t know where the cup of life is and Arthur would refuse to let me use it. I can’t use it anyway. I can’t cause someone else’s death just for my sake.” He clenched his fist tightly and blinked when he felt Gwen’s hands enclosing it. It calmed him and he asked, “Is there any other way?”

“Perhaps. There is a rare herb that I know of that increases fertility. Properly prepared, it can be very potent. You also have magic enough to shapeshift for limited times, do you not?”

“So you’re saying to use the shapeshifting spell on the herbs…?”

“No. You would need something else as a catalyst to bring the two together.”

It was a testament to how long he’d been friends with Kilgharrah that he figured out what he was saying. “Dragon magic. I bring the herb to you and you use your dragon magic to combine my magic, the magic of the old religion, with the herb?”

“Yes.”

“What will that do?” Gwen asked. “Will it make him a woman?”

Kilgharrah looked at her for a long moment, then to Merlin, and back again. “No. The shapeshifting spell will be changed by my magic so that he will remain male for the most part, but not all. It will give him the internal ability to bear children.”

“If the two combining spells will do that, then why do I need the herb?” Merlin asked in confusion.

“Because without it, you will never be fertile enough to conceive. You must take a much higher dose and repeatedly to make it effective. Without it, the spell will be useless.”

He let out a sigh of relief and began to smile. “Thank you, Kilgharrah. I didn’t know if—”

“Listen to me, Merlin. There are some things you need to know.” His smile began to slip. That seriousness was never a good sign. “This particular mixing of spells and herbs is very rarely successful. It was tried long ago, when the old religion still ruled, but often the spells never took to the person or the herbs just could not increase the fertility enough to conceive. There is a great chance that this will fail.”

“If it does, what happens?”

“No harm will befall you, if that is your concern. It will just as likely fade away as if you had never done anything at all. You must also be aware that the spell is temporary. It will last merely weeks and supposing the spell does successfully take to you and you take the herbs daily, it will still take more than once to conceive. Are you sure you want to do this?”

“Yes.”

“Then summon me when you have the herb in your possession and I will tell you how to prepare it.” Kilgharrah burst into the sky then, flying off to wherever he slept during the day.

Gwen squeezed his hand. “Now tell me the truth, Merlin. What are you going to do?”

“I’m going to go through with it…but don’t tell Arthur about it. We can’t because if it doesn’t work…”

“Merlin, Arthur should know about this. It’s not just your decision!”

“And if I tell him and the spell doesn’t work, Gwen? He’ll be crushed! I can’t hurt him like that!”

Gwen’s eyes were glittering with determination. “Kilgharrah didn’t tell you what the herb was, so that means you’ll have to ask Gaius, right?”

“…Right…?”

“Well if you don’t tell Arthur just what you’re planning, then I’ll make _sure_ that Gaius won’t help you.”

“Gwen!”

“I’m _serious_ , Merlin. You are _going_ to learn that you can’t do everything on your own! You’ve spent years hiding things, doing these spells on your own without any input whatsoever and suffered because of it. Now your friends know and should be involved. This is a life-changing event, Merlin, you can’t just spring it on Arthur that suddenly you’re pregnant! Particularly since it’s going to be _obvious_ that magic caused it!”

He hadn’t thought that far. How would they explain it to Camelot? He bit his lip. Considering what Arthur had gone through to keep him safe, he needed to know. Sighing, he nodded and allowed himself to be bullied by Gwen. He had always wanted his friends to see him for who he was, magic and all, but now he was beginning to see downsides to them knowing…


	8. Chapter 8

There was silence from the room and Merlin shifted awkwardly, staring at the table. Arthur was sitting at the head of it in his room, bracing one elbow on his seat and his hand covering his mouth. There was no telling at what he was thinking from the look on his face, but his eyes seemed to bore holes into Merlin. Gaius’ eyes were closed, head tilted down, as if by doing so he could unhear what the young sorcerer had said.

Even Lancelot was looking at him in shock and he bit his lip. Had he gone too far? But there wasn’t any other way! Gwen stood next to him and he drew on her presence for moral support. It was probably the first time she and Arthur had been in the same room together since their relationship had ended.

Finally Arthur shifted in his chair. “Merlin, our marriage happened because there were rumors of your magic use. You can’t do this, if no other reason than that.”

“But Arthur, you _want_ children, don’t you?”

“That doesn’t matter. I will not have you hurt—”

“Actually…”

Merlin blinked and both he and the king turned to Gwaine. The five knights had been in deep conversation, all clustered in a group. When had that happened? He hadn’t even noticed, so focused on Arthur.

“What is it, Gwaine?” Arthur prompted, too controlled which meant that he was reining in a lot of emotions.

“We…lied. A little bit. We didn’t hear rumors that Merlin had magic. We…were trying to get you together.” Elyan was silently staring at Gwen, but Percival prodded Gwaine to continue. “You two were in love for a long time and not that we don’t love Gwen, but we could see that it would end in disaster when you two _did_ realize your feelings.”

Arthur’s hand was clenched into a fist in anger, but he was controlling himself remarkably well. Merlin’s jaw dropped in shock. His suffering, his guilt…was for no reason? He hadn’t done anything wrong? So the thought that he had _forced_ Arthur into this wasn’t true. It was the knights who had forced both of them…

“We tried to find ways to tell you both,” Percival explained, seeming to shrink a little under their gazes. “We just couldn’t figure out how.”

The king was about to stand up and really Merlin didn’t know what was going to happen, wasn’t sure he’d save any of them if Arthur went on a killing spree, but it was Gaius that saved situation. “Regardless of what they said or did before this point, the fact is immaterial.” He turned his gaze on Merlin. “What you’re proposing is impossible, Merlin, and _very_ dangerous. There would be no other choice than to admit your magic to the kingdom. We have no other plausible explanation for why you disappear after a few months and why you suddenly come back with a boy you claim is of Arthur’s own blood. Please tell me you realize this.”

“I know,” he said. “To be honest, if Gwen didn’t force me to, I wouldn’t have told anyone because Kilgharrah said it wasn’t likely to work.”

At that, Arthur’s fixed attention at his knights snapped to him. Merlin flinched a little as his husband frowned fiercely. “You would have kept such a big thing from me?”

“Yes,” he said frankly, “because it could fail to work and I didn’t…want to get your hopes up.”

Silence invaded again and he resisted the urge to babble in nerves. He was shaking and when Gwen slipped her hand into his for support, he squeezed her fingers tightly. Arthur shook his head. “No, Merlin. The reason you even asked is apparently a lie, so you have no reason to feel guilty any longer and perform this spell.”

“I didn’t do it just because of that!” Merlin argued back. “I did it because…because you want kids even though you won’t say it and you need an heir and…” He felt his brief indignation disappear. “I can’t even explain all the reasons.”

Arthur rubbed at his eyes and sighed heavily. “Enough. We’ll talk about it tonight. As for _you_ five…” The five knights straightened at the barely controlled menace in his voice, “get down to the training grounds. Now.”

“Sire, we really didn’t mean to—”

“I don’t care what you meant to do. I plan to make you feel every inch of Merlin’s guilt and pain for the past month that you put him through for no reason. Now. _Go_.”

Not even Gwaine opened his mouth to argue and Merlin watched as each of them threw him an apologetic look before leaving. As Arthur stormed to the side to grab his sword and head down, he thought he could forgive the knights as his husband would be taking out all the punishment for him. It just wouldn’t be fair to still be angry when they came back with bruises and possibly broken limbs. “Gaius…”

“I’m going to prepare the salves, yes,” the old physician said. “I dare say they’ll be regretting this for a long time to come.”

Once Gaius had left the room, he turned to Gwen nervously. “Gwen? Are…you okay?”

Her head jerked, as if she had been lost in her own thoughts, and she dropped his hand. “Not really, if you want honesty.”

“I’m—”

“Don’t say you’re sorry. It’s not your fault. It’s _not_ your fault. It’s not Arthur’s fault.”

“Are you angry at the knights?”

“Yes. I can’t believe they did that and I want to hurt them, even Elyan.” She dropped into a chair and put her head in her hands. “But I know now, watching you and Arthur, that they were right to do it. It’s as clear as day how much you two were meant for each other. I know that they wanted to save everyone a lot of heartache. I know that in my head yet I’m still so mad at them!”

Merlin crouched next to her. “It’s okay to be mad at them. No one would blame you for it.”

“How could _Elyan_ …”

“He wanted to look out for his sister and he thought he was doing so. I don’t like what they did one bit, but I know they did it because they wanted to help. Besides, Arthur’s down there now making sure they’ll never do it again. Let’s leave our revenge with him.”

Gwen managed a weak smile. “Thank you, Merlin.”

“For what?” he asked, standing.

She just shook her head. “For…still being my friend even though I treated you coldly this last month.”

His eyes widened. “I didn’t think you were cold! I didn’t blame you for avoiding me!”

“I’m still angry and I’m still upset, but we’re still friends, all right?” She wiped suspiciously bright eyes and stood up. “Now, let’s go help Gaius. He’s going to need it after Arthur’s done.”

-0-

Merlin already had Arthur’s bath ready when the king returned, sweaty and looking tired. He quietly removed the armor and weapons, dropping them on the floor at his husband’s command despite his frustration with leaving a mess for other servants to clean up. Every one of the knights had suffered a broken bone with the exception of Lancelot, who had pulled two muscles in his sword arm and twisted his ankle. Arthur had been brutal, supposedly drilling them for hours, but it was more a one-sided beating. They would have to heal on their own with the exception of the broken bones. Merlin had refused to let those be and had healed them with magic.

Arthur undressed and threw his clothes toward an empty laundry basket accidentally left by a servant, but missed. He didn’t even pause and instead crawled into the water. Merlin, with a roll of his eyes, attempted to clean up the mess.

“Merlin.”

“What? You could at least pay slightly more attention to what you’re doing—”

“Get in here with me.”

He frowned in annoyance, but made Arthur wait as he at least set the chainmail aside for it to brought back down to the barracks, and the clothes in the basket. He eyed Arthur in the tub, blushing just a little. “You’re the one that needs it—”

“If you don’t get undressed in the next five minutes, you’re going to be in here with me dressed. It’s your choice.”

Merlin sighed heavily and threw up his hands. “You’re a bloody mood,” he complained as he, far more carefully, pulled off his old clothes. “I don’t get a choice in this, huh? Just do what Arthur says, he knows best…” He set his clothes in the basket and gently eased into the hot tub. It was wonderful what magic could do, he thought with a smile.

Arthur’s arms wrapped around him from behind, urging him to lean back against his chest and Merlin found himself doing so without any conscious part of his brain in the mix. His husband’s legs were on either side of his hips now, enclosing him in a puddle of warmth and his irritation began to ease away as he felt hands smoothing up and down his front and sides, lightly pressing into his muscles and massaging them. He wasn’t the one that needed it, but it felt nice to be pampered.

“That’s one problem taken care of. Let’s move onto the _other_ one.”

Merlin’s eyes had fallen closed, but they slipped open a little at Arthur’s words. “Do we have to do this now? I know what you’re going to say.”

“You do, huh?”

“You’re going to say no and give me reasons why not.”

Lips nuzzled at his ear, lightly nipping at the lobe with his teeth and Merlin shivered. “You don’t know everything, Merlin.”

“Fine. Say it.” _Go ahead and tell me I’m an idiot for trying to help you, you clotpole_ , he ranted in his head.

“We don’t have to do the spell now. Let’s take it a few steps at a time, Merlin. Give us at least three months of marriage before we shake things up again. Then we’ll reveal you have magic to Camelot and give it another few months for them to get used to it. We have to let them know about your magic before this because assuming this works, that’s going to be a bit much for them to take at once.”

“I don’t think so,” Merlin argued. “Everyone in Camelot loves you, Arthur. They trust you and I think they really appreciate you repealing the old laws against magic. You’re a just and fair king and I think they trust you a lot, so if you say you’ve fallen in love and married a sorcerer, they’d trust you that I wasn’t evil.”

Arthur sighed. “First, I haven’t actually repealed it yet. I just put out the idea that it could be in the future and watching to see who’s against it and who’s for it. Secondly, I can’t blindly trust your assertions that those in Camelot would trust me no matter what I said. I _won’t_ trust your beliefs when it’s not my life on the line if you’re wrong, it’s yours.”

Merlin could tell by the calm way that Arthur spoke that he had been rehearsing this in his head for a while and there was likely no budging him on it. At least today. He might have greater success tomorrow, when Arthur had plenty of wine in him from the feast. Hands were easing down his stomach with intent now and he shivered in delight. “You haven’t said what you feel about it though.”

“Feel about what?”

“The idea. The spell.”

“I’m…afraid for you. With women, there is still a risk of the mother dying during the birth, or the baby, or both. You’re talking about becoming pregnant with a body that isn’t designed for it. You haven’t thought about what you’re going to do when it’s time for the actual birth and I’m worried that no matter what has to be done at that time that you won’t survive through the process. I’m not sure what you want to do is worth the risk of your life.” Arthur sighed, his breath ruffling Merlin’s hair. “If my father had held these concerns for Yggraine, I might have had a mother growing up.”

“Or you might not be here at all,” he whispered. “If you weren’t here, I’d have no reason to exist.”

“Stop that. You don’t exist for me, you exist for yourself…though I’m honored you think so highly of me.”

“So you’re not outright saying no?”

“No. Right now, I’m saying let’s revisit this conversation six to nine months down the road. It doesn’t have to be right now, does it?”

“Well, it’s going to take time and effort if the spell takes, you know. It’s not going to happen quickly.”

“Unless you envision me dying in the next nine months, there really isn’t a reason to rush.” Hands finally slid reached their destination and Merlin let out a soft sigh at the pleasant sensation. “I know you’re trying to help and I…appreciate it.” Lips kissed the side of Merlin’s temple. “Really. Thank you. And I should thank Gwen for making you talk to me.”

“It’s just, I’m so used to doing things on my own,” he muttered, attempting to keep his mind on the right track.

“Not anymore, Merlin. Now close your eyes and relax.”

He sighed and did just that.


	9. Chapter 9

They almost didn’t make it to the feast and Arthur blamed that entirely on Merlin. He was just too irresistible and those lips pouting were like a siren call he couldn’t resist. In the end, he’d been forced to give in to the pout and Merlin wore his favorite red scarf. He said it was because it had emotional significance, but Arthur privately thought it was to hide the red marks he’d left on his neck in their passion.

The hall was filled when they entered and sat down and he eyed his knights at their places in a bit of satisfaction. Leon had a black eye, Lancelot was favoring his right arm, and there was a small but slightly visible cut on Elyan’s forehead. Gwen had taken to coming over to help Lancelot when she could as he seemed to struggle to lift things without spilling them. It should have probably left him with a bit of guilt, but Arthur felt none. He understood why they had done it, and in some ways he was quite glad because he wouldn’t have realized his feelings without them, but he was absolutely incensed despite that for what they put Merlin through. He would never forget the look on his husband’s face whenever he’d let the guilt eat away at him and it would choke his heart.

Percival met his eyes and licked his lips, but he didn’t look down at the table. He stared right back, asking silently the question that had been asked of him after he had finished his punishment with them. Were they forgiven? He could see by how Merlin treated them that he forgave them for what they’d done. Not that that made him any happier when Merlin had thrown his words right back at him.

_“You said that if person that gave up the most for it is happy, then there’s no reason I should be upset. Well, if the person that was hurt the most about what happened has forgiven them, then there’s no reason for you not to either!”_

He tapped his fingers on the arm of his chair and finally gave the slightest nod. He supposed he wouldn’t punish them further since Merlin didn’t want him to. He turned his attention over to Bayard, who was watching the entertainment with amusement. Evidently he felt the stare since he shifted his gaze to Arthur.

“If nothing else, no one can say that Camelot doesn’t know how to throw a feast. You will have to come to Mercia so we might return the favor.”

“Yes, one day we will,” he said blandly.

Slowly the king began to smile. “And will the king and his consort dance for us? This is, after all, a mutual celebration and congratulations of your marriage.”

Merlin’s head snapped up from where he’d been talking to Gaius. They had avoided dancing during the wedding feast mostly because they hadn’t been there long enough given the usual tradition of ‘wedding night’. Arthur considered Merlin’s clear position against it in his eyes and then Bayard. He could hardly say no in this situation and he nodded after a minute.

He stood up and leaned over his husband’s chair, holding out his hand. “Shall we share a dance?”

“No,” Merlin hissed quietly. “I would like to point out that you know very well I can’t dance.”

“I’ll lead,” he said and gestured with his fingers for Merlin to take his hand.

“Well if we look like idiots, it’s your own fault.”

Arthur rolled his eyes, but led Merlin to the cleared space for entertainment. The band shifted, playing a different song and at least it was one that he was familiar with. The men playing were Bayard’s and he had been prepared to be caught in a tune and dance he didn’t know. Perhaps Uther hadn’t been right when he’d said that treaty and ally aside, Bayard was childish like that.

Despite being clumsy by nature, Merlin did his best and surprisingly well at following along with the steps. Their eyes met and he found himself smiling in amusement at his husband’s clear determination not to embarrass himself. Not that he thought it would make much difference if he did; Merlin seemed to be able to take all that in stride with an unrepentant shrug and grin and move on.

He found himself pulling Merlin closer to him, snatching a kiss here and there whenever the dance called for them to be close. It almost became like a game between them and the moment he thought that, it only escalated. Merlin, being limber as he was, kept getting in more kisses, and nearing the end of the song, Arthur spun his husband around, dipped him, and stole a passionate one for himself, which he felt trumped all the little pecks that Merlin kept grabbing.

There was a cute little sigh from Merlin as he gave himself to the sensations and Arthur would have been more than willing to continue if he didn’t catch the candles and torches in the room all flare brightly in unison with no outside influence. Oh damn. As soon as their lips parted, they settled down, but not before Merlin realized what he’d done.

“…I didn’t mean to.”

“You never mean to, Merlin, but you always destroy my carefully laid plans,” he said with a grumble, straightening his husband. There was no point in speaking quietly because the entire room was silent. They had all seen it and Arthur could have probably explained away one or two flames, but all of them in the well-lit room at the exact same time? Even he wasn’t a miracle worker.

The knights were looking around, tense, clearly wondering if they were going to have to jump in to protect the new consort. Gwen’s hands were clenching onto a pitcher in her hands tightly and even Gaius was shifting in his seat, as if preparing to rush to his feet. If he didn’t get control of this situation quickly, it could end in disaster.

“I suppose I should have mentioned at least in passing that Merlin happens to have magic.”

Gwaine let out a small chuff of laughter at his attempt for a boyish ‘oops’. If they made it seem like a big deal, the feast was ruined. Bayard was looking at him in contemplation and he leaned back in his chair, saying, “Interesting development, King Arthur, but isn’t it true that Camelot still has laws that demand a sorcerer’s death?”

“And it was always my plan to repeal those laws.”

“Why haven’t you?”

“I was preferring to move at an unhurried pace.”

“You don’t trust your own people?”

He frowned. “I trust those that serve Camelot and live here implicitly, but I felt there was no need to rush things. As much as I love my people, they have had a great surprise when I announced my engagement to Merlin, who was both my manservant and male. I didn’t want to cause them more concern by stating that he was a sorcerer right then.”

Arthur settled back at the table, Merlin’s hand in his. He could feel the slight tremble of worry and fear from his husband. Never before had so many people known about his talent and he’d spent all his life hiding. He squeezed his fingers in reassurance. He would never let anyone hurt Merlin. Ever.

After a minute, Bayard gestured to the musicians who slowly began to play again. The same lighthearted atmosphere wasn’t quite there and while people began to talk again, it was about Merlin. “I trust this won’t affect our treaty?”

“Of course not. I never shared Uther’s hatred of magic. As I said before, if there is a problem, it is not from Mercia.”

“Good.” He turned and lifted Merlin’s hand to his lips, kissing his knuckles softly. It was a testament to how worried he was that Merlin didn’t even blush. Arthur frowned just a little. This wasn’t as big a deal as he was making it out to be, at least he hoped not. The tenser Merlin became, the worse the reaction would be. He was sure that by now half the castle had learned thanks to gossiping servants, and he didn’t need it to become more than he was. He was already going to have to calm fears that he was enchanted from the more paranoid in his court.

“This will present problems for you, won’t it? His ability?”

“Yes, but they are not insurmountable. I will take care of it. No one will touch him.”

Bayard nodded after a minute as Arthur let him see his determination. “Those here from Mercia wish for nothing more than a happy, long life to you and your consort.” He lifted up his wine as a toast.

Well, one hurdle down…

-0-

“Merlin, it’s not something that can’t be fixed,” Arthur tried to reason. “Honestly. I’ll make the announcement, with you _next to me_ , and we’ll go from there. The first step is you have to leave the room. Please stop hiding behind the curtains in mortification.”

Merlin sighed heavily and slumped against the stone wall. Bayard had left yesterday and the reason for postponing the announcement speech of his magic had disappeared with him. He had been embarrassed that a simple kiss from Arthur had distracted him enough that he hadn’t been paying any attention to his magic. Of how many times he’d almost displayed his powers for the world to see and managed to keep it quiet and _this_ time it was just something stupid like a kiss!

Finally he slipped out from behind the curtains and this time Arthur didn’t even comment that he wore his old clothes. To be honest, Merlin wasn’t convinced he shouldn’t just leave before things really escalated. Arthur’s hand gripped his tightly, and by the way he held it, the sorcerer knew he wasn’t going anywhere. The king was not going to lose his husband, apparently.

He could feel the eyes staring at him as they walked down the hall and when he moved closer to Arthur, an arm wrapped around his waist possessively. “I’m sorry,” he muttered.

“It isn’t what I wanted, but I can’t say that it’s a disaster yet,” he said frankly. Halfway to the balcony the knights joined them, seeming to instinctively settle in a protective, circular pattern around them.

“You’ll be fine,” Lancelot assured him. “I swear.”

He winced as he was led onto the balcony and looked down. The entire courtyard was packed with people, so much so that they were jostling just to get a bit of breathing room. Apparently the gossip was faster than wildfire. He recognized some faces from below and was at least relieved to see that those he knew didn’t look on him with hatred or disgust, but instead concern.

“Though I’m sure you have all heard by now,” Arthur said, “I’ll make it clear right now: Merlin is a sorcerer. I realize that this is a fact I should have told you before, but to be honest, I felt that it was immaterial at the time. Whether he did or didn’t have magic made no difference in my feelings. There were also other concerns, like the law banning magic that I have been attempting to repeal.” There was a rippling murmur from below, but no one moved. Arthur let it settle before he said bluntly, “I also want to state, before any rumors get started, that I am in no way enchanted.

“Well, _magically_ enchanted I should say.” There was actually a faint ripple of laughter at that and the knights both around them and below were grinning. Merlin couldn’t help but feel proud of Arthur for the loyalty he inspired just by being who he was. “I can’t say what’s to happen in the future, but I do know that I trust Merlin with my life. In the past few years, even when my father was still ruling, I began to see that magic in and of itself wasn't evil; it was just how it was used. Since learning of Merlin’s magic, I realized how many times he’s saved me and others with it. It is for this reason, not just because of my feelings for Merlin, that I have been moving to abolish the ban on magic.

“As such, I plan to appoint Merlin Court Warlock.”

Merlin jerked, staring at Arthur in shock, but the king merely kept him pulled against his side protectively. Since when?! Why didn’t Arthur warn him that he was going to do this?! What, so apparently he had changed his mind about telling the people of Camelot gradually and decided that an ‘all-at-once’ scenario was a better plan?!

Thankfully no one was expecting Merlin to say anything and he was led back inside. By the time the walls closed in around them again, he had found his tongue. “For a second there, I thought you were going to tell them that I was considering ways of getting pregnant.”

“I thought about it,” Arthur said, “but because there’s a possibility of it not working…”

“So does that mean we’re revisiting the discussion sooner rather than later?”

Arthur wasn’t looking at him, but Merlin could feel him squeeze his waist. There was a contemplative frown on his face and it was probably because of the knights still there that Arthur wasn’t pounced by the nearby advisors that appeared to be stewing. “Merlin, I don’t know if this is a wise course of action for us. I don’t…want to lose you.”

“And I want to give you something you want and solve a problem you have at the same time. Trust me, Arthur. I’ve managed a lot worse situations than this and Kilgharrah said nothing bad would happen to me if the spell failed to take.”

Arthur looked at the knights silently and Gwaine shifted. “I don’t know, Merlin. Arthur’s right, anything could happen.”

“I understand your concerns and it might mean a lot if I was doing this alone, but I’m not. I’ve got you guys, Gaius, Arthur, and Gwen. You think Gaius would let me put one toe out of line if it meant I’d get so much as a hangnail? _If_ it succeeds, you’ll be with me every step of the way.”

He heard the sigh next to him and Arthur’s shoulders seemed to slump with defeat. “It’s…your choice, Merlin.”

“Then I’m doing it.”

“I really hope I don’t regret this…”

Merlin grinned and leaned in to whisper in Arthur’s ear, “But you’ll love the part that comes up to it, promise.”

“ _Merlin_ …”


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NOT WORKSAFE

Despite what he’d said, Merlin thought he might have been a bit too hopeful in how he expected Camelot to react to Arthur’s speech. They didn’t ostracize the king of course, but his husband was a different matter. At least half the servants in the palace avoided him out of fear and the other half stared at him as if he were some form of entertainment. The ones that treated him normally were no more than a handful. Gwen, a few of the kitchen staff, and one of the stablehands acted as if nothing had happened.

The knights were a different story. He’d been concerned about that once he’d see the servants of the palace, but they treated him no different. It was a relief and maybe the reason for it was that he had been Arthur’s manservant for so long that they knew him. At least, he thought darkly, if someone was going to assassinate him, there’d be people around to try to protect him.

Merlin leaned against a tree and sighed heavily. For the first time in what felt like forever, he was alone. Arthur would have a fit when he found out that Merlin had left Camelot alone, but honestly, Merlin was used to doing whatever he wanted when he wanted it for the most part. And perhaps he was cowardly, but he wanted to get away from the stares for a while.

So he forced himself to look and hunt for the herb that Kilgharrah had told him about. He was not entirely convinced that it was going to work, but he would try anything. He wanted to see Arthur’s children, wanted to see Arthur smile in pride, and his joy at putting a sword in the child’s hand once they were old enough. Merlin had no doubt that even if he conceived and had a girl that she’d end up probably in swordplay just like her father.

As he found himself wandering further into the forest, he frowned. Gaius had said the herb was nearby, so where was it? He had said to be absolutely sure to pick the right one, because there was a very similar looking plant that was used for virility. Similar, but not quite what Merlin needed. He crouched down to look under the leaves of a bush and froze at the sound of a stick cracking behind him.

His magic rushed to his fingertips in his defense and he waited, ready to turn and unleash it. A hand touched his shoulder just as he spun, and he barely managed to control himself before he sent his friend flying into a nearby tree. “Lancelot!” he gasped, panting and trying to calm his heart. “What are you doing here?”

“I was sent to bring you back.”

“Arthur noticed, huh?”

“I’m afraid so.”

“Well I’m not going back without that herb.” He stood up, dusting off his worn but still serviceable pants. “You want to help?”

“What am I looking for?”

Hopefully this would make the search faster, Merlin thought as he described the small plant. They were quiet for a few minutes before Lancelot asked, “Are you really all right with this?”

“With what?”

“What you’re planning on doing. You say it’s what Arthur wants and needs, but what about you?”

Merlin smiled at his worried friend. “I want to see Arthur happy with a child and I know I can give it to him.” He looked down at the base of a tree. “And maybe I’m a bit selfish, but _I_ want to be the one to give it to him.”

“ _You_ , selfish? You’re probably the most selfless person in the world,” Lancelot told him.

He laughed and headed closer to the nearby stream. “I can be selfish sometimes,” he said with a grin. “Just not many people let me.”

“Merlin, you know as well as I do that Arthur would give you anything. You can be as selfish as you want with him and you know it.”

“No matter what he says?”

“Especially no matter what he says. That’s what it’s like to be in love, at least for Arthur.”

That brought up a delicate question stewing in Merlin’s brain. “So…Gwen?”

“What about her?”

Merlin looked long and hard at Lancelot. “You still love her, don’t you?”

“I do,” the man admitted without pause.

“So…?”

“We’ve spoken as friends and that’s it. I haven’t mentioned my continuing feelings. I don’t want to pressure her.”

“But you won’t be!”

“Let it be, Merlin. Let me do it my way?”

He pursed his lips but nodded, forcing himself to look away. Something caught the corner of his eye and he quickly moved over to the bank. “Found it!” he crowed, reaching out and gently working out the small plant from the damp earth. While he considered finding more in case it didn’t work, Kilgharrah said it would last for a few weeks. Trying to be positive, Merlin told himself that it was entirely possible that he wouldn’t _need_ another herb.

“I have to go see Kilgharrah,” he said as Lancelot quickly came over and peered over his shoulder when he carefully set the plant in the bag he’d brought with. “Do you want to come?”

“Yes. The last thing I want is to return to the palace without you,” his friend told him with a smile. “Arthur might actually break my legs.”

“I’d just heal them when I got back,” Merlin told him with a laugh.

“I’d rather not get them broken in the first place. Lead on, dragonlord.”

Trying to ignore a sudden knot of nerves in his stomach, Merlin went to their usual meeting place.

-0-

Gaius was looking at him as he handed over the small phial and his concern completely outmatched Lancelot’s. “I’m going to be fine,” he assured them.

“It’s going to take a few hours to fully absorb into your system.”

He glanced out the window at the sun. It was late afternoon, so he had plenty of time before tonight. Merlin fingered the bottle, feeling the nervousness appear again and he wasn’t even sure _why_. It wasn’t as if he and Arthur hadn’t been intimate before. The gods only knew that Arthur seemed incapable of keeping his hands and other body parts to himself on the best of days.

“Are you sure you want to do this, Merlin?”

The one thing that Merlin wasn’t feeling was doubt. Nervousness, concern, excitement, but not doubt. The thought of not doing this had never once crossed his mind. “I’m sure, Gaius.”

Lancelot sighed. “Arthur is a very, very lucky man. There aren’t many that find their soulmate like he has or would do so much for him like you do.”

“I hope the king realizes that,” the old physician muttered.

“It’s not like it’s a great hardship,” he muttered, blushing a little at the praise and love from both of his friends. Before they could protest again, he quickly swallowed the whole mixture and grimaced at the bitter taste.

“We’re just worried about you.”

“And I’m fine, Gaius. I _will_ be fine. I just need to avoid Arthur until tonight.”

“Avoid the king? Why?”

“Because he can’t keep his hands to himself normally, do you really think he’ll have the self-control to hold back now? He’ll never say it, but he’s looking forward to tonight since he knows it’s going to take more than once.” When it hit him after a second just what he’d said and to who, he turned bright red.

“Then I suppose we should tell the court not to expect to see Arthur until afternoon tomorrow.”

His eyes narrowed. “Was that a joke, Gaius?” He turned to Lancelot. “I think that was a joke.”

Gaius waved him away with a smile. “Go find somewhere else to hide.”

As Lancelot headed for the door, Merlin remained there for a moment longer. “Thank you, Gaius,” he said sincerely.

“Oh go on. I have to figure out a way to explain to Hunith that she might be a grandmother soon.”

“Better you than me.”

-0-

Merlin was sitting on the edge of Arthur’s desk when his husband came in that night, breathing a heavy sigh. “Long day?” he asked as the king pulled off his coat and threw it over the back of a chair.

“Very. Where were you today?”

“I went out to find that herb.”

Arthur eyed him. “You really don’t wait. We just discussed it three days ago. You couldn’t even go a week without putting yourself in some magical sort of danger?”

“It’s not going to be dangerous,” he argued. “Kilgharrah said that if the spell doesn’t work, it’ll be like it didn’t happen at all.”

The king approached, lightly wrapping his arms around Merlin’s slimmer form and kissing him softly. “I swear you have no self-preservation instincts.”

“Maybe not…but I do know the spell is complete.”

“Really.” A flash of lust darkened those blue eyes and their hips were leaned together just a little.

“Really.” Merlin leaned in for another kiss and moaned slightly as hands stroked down his spine in just the right way before coming to rest on his rear.

“You don’t want to wait?”

Merlin scoffed. “How many times are you going to ask that? It’s already going to take time. It could be a whole year before it actually works. _If_ it works.”

“I just want you to be sure, Merlin. If it works, it’s not something that can be undone.”

“I’m sure, Arthur.”

Arthur sighed heavily and their foreheads rested together briefly. “I just can’t say no to you.”

The fire flared a little brighter as Merlin stole another kiss, this one with a distinctly passionate bent to it. “Probably a good thing,” he told him with a smirk.

The king gave him a frown, but Merlin could see that he didn’t mean it. “A king isn’t supposed to be so easily swayed.” The hands on his rear tightened a little before Arthur pulled him up. Merlin wrapped his legs around his husband as he was carried over to the bed.

“Other kings don’t have an attractive husband like me ready to give them the night of their life,” he said with a grin.

Arthur actually growled a bit at that. “They better not. One person lays a hand on you, they won’t have it for long.”

“How cute, you’re possessive.”

“It’s not cute, it’s supposed to be threatening.”

“How about adorable? Does that work better than cute?”

“No.”

In their conversation, Arthur had been stripping off their clothing, throwing it to the floor without looking. Later Merlin would rant about how they were lucky that they hadn’t gone an inch further into the fireplace and were burned. He bit his lip instead as Arthur leaned down and wrapped his lips around one nipple and his thumb teasing the other. His fingers eased into blonde hair and he arched with a gasp when there was a light nip.

Just as he was about to settle in for more of that, those teasing lips had moved, kissing his chest and then moving to his stomach and slowly going further down. It didn’t take a genius to figure out where Arthur was going and Merlin blushed heavily, squirming in anticipation. They hadn’t done much experimenting since they’d been intimate barely a month, but Merlin could figure some things out on his own, thank you very much.

“Oil, Merlin.”

Merlin chewed on his lip a little as his eyes glowed golden and the small jar of oil they kept hovered over to him. Arthur had grown singularly attached to his magic, particularly in things like this. The king reached out and slicked his fingers, easing them to his rear as he peppered kisses over Merlin’s stomach. He couldn’t help but gasp at the first digit, the jar dropping, but his magic caught it again, barely, before it shattered against the floor.

Arthur didn’t seem to be paying any attention to it and instead, his kisses had finally, finally moved and Merlin moaned loudly at the feeling of lips on his arousal. It felt like a tease and he shifted on the bed again in impatience, toes curling in the sheets. “Arthur…” he complained.

Arthur didn’t answer. Instead he pushed in his second finger at the same time as he wrapped his lips around Merlin, and he tried, he really did, but he couldn’t help a shout. This time the jar really did drop, but a rug was unconsciously yanked over and prevented it from breaking. It spilled half of it on the floor and Merlin knew he should be concerned about this, but Arthur’s mouth was hot and he was touching that spot and wow, he didn’t care about anything right then other than _more._

“Gods, Arthur!” One hand dove into his hair and he would apologize later for pulling a little, not that his husband seemed to mind. He tried not to buck his hips, but failed. The sucking was getting more passionate every time Merlin moved his hips and in between one thrust, a third finger had entered.

Arthur pulled away far too soon and he let out a dejected whimper of disapproval. “Shhh,” he whispered in Merlin’s ear, his fingers stroking him inside, urging him to calm a little. “Where’s the oil, Merlin?”

He managed to open his eyes and glance around. Eyes grew gold again and the jar lifted itself and came over, having barely half left after it had spilled most of its contents. Merlin could gather it up without a problem magically, but it took more concentration than he had at the moment. Arthur began to coat himself, a soft moan escaping his lips.

The thought just hit him and would not be dislodged. As Arthur leaned over him, hands going to his hips, Merlin abruptly said, “Stop.”

Arthur froze. “What?”

“I want to…be the one on top. I mean, you know…um…”

“You mean you want to ride me?”

Merlin couldn’t actually say it, mumbling something instead around his blush, and nodded. Arthur began to smile, though it seemed to have the edges of a smirk to it, and he immediately moved to the side, stretching out on the bed. He tried not to look down, but failed and stared a little at Arthur’s arousal pointing skyward. He gulped a bit, but he felt a hand rest on his hip and remind him silently that his friend and lover would be there to guide him so he didn’t do anything wrong.

Merlin threw his leg over Arthur and hovered above his hips. Before he could ask what to do, Arthur was already whispering to him, not a trace of teasing. His insides flooded with affectionate warmth because while they bantered back and forth and took shots at each other all the time, they both knew there were certain things that they just didn’t tease at and Arthur knew very well that Merlin disliked his own inexperience.

“Reach back and guide me where you need me to be, and then ease down. Take your time and don’t rush. That’s it,” Arthur purred as Merlin followed directions and he felt his husband’s tip pressing against his entrance. “You can stop at any point if you need to.”

He moved slowly, grunting a little as he felt the tip completely penetrate. Merlin didn’t stop, kept going downward until he couldn’t anymore. Arthur actually gasped beneath him as he encased him completely. The sting of the stretch was nowhere near what it had been the first time they’d had sex, but that didn’t stop his magic from flaring. A little shudder went through the bedframe, but it remained where it was.

“Still…as tight…as ever,” Arthur muttered, hips jerking beneath Merlin as he struggled not to thrust.

Despite a soft moan escaping, Merlin grinned. He lifted his hips and brought them back down, Arthur letting out a quiet but heartfelt grunt of pleasure. Fingers gripped his hips, tugging him just a little this way and that and when Merlin eased up and down again, cried out when Arthur touched that pleasurable spot. He chose to ignore his husband’s satisfied smirk.

“Merlin,” Arthur cooed and Merlin leaned down to kiss him fiercely as if it had been a command. Soon the king had caught his rhythm and was thrusting up when he would move down. He whimpered as a shudder went down his spine, but when he reached between them to touch himself, Arthur’s hands batted him away.

“Arthur, wh-what?”

“I want to see if you’ll come without being touched.”

His eyes widened and he whimpered, but gripped the sheets instead. If that’s what his king wanted, he’d give it to him. “Arthur…” he moaned and yelped at a heavier, sharper thrust up.

“Look at me, Merlin.” Merlin wasn’t sure when his eyes had closed, but he looked down at Arthur obediently. Blue eyes were serious as they met his. “I love you.”

He gasped as a shudder went through his frame, feeling the edge finally creeping closer. “I love you too, Arthur. So much. More than anything. I want to make you happy and—”

“Shhh, Merlin. I know. You’re close, aren’t you?”

“Y-Yes!”

“Good because I am too.” Arthur sat up and Merlin wrapped his arms around his shoulders tightly. Their lips came together again and again like magnets and he gave in, letting Arthur control the pace and the movements. He felt his erection brushing against muscular abs and he had to leave crescent moon shapes in Arthur’s back to keep his hands there instead of stroking himself. He buried his face in the king’s neck, letting out a soft, keening wail, as Arthur pushed him over the edge. He clenched tightly, making his husband gasp, and not a moment later he felt him release too.

Arthur flopped back into the pillows, panting, and Merlin rested on his chest for a minute, just trying to regain some sense. His magic had only rattled the windows when he’d come this time and he blushed as he realized that there was a suspiciously heart-shaped puff of smoke over the fire. He quickly erased with a swipe of magic before Arthur noticed.

“Gods, Merlin…”

Merlin waited for something else, but it seemed that was all Arthur was capable of saying. He grinned at that. “I made you speechless. That will go down forever in history.”

“Me speechless? Watch me make _you_ speechless,” Arthur retaliated, rolling them over and pinning Merlin to the bed.

“ _If_ you can, My Lord.”

Arthur growled a little and set out to prove he could and if it took all night, then so be it.


	11. Chapter 11

“ _Merlin_!”

Merlin shuddered, gripping uselessly at the table beneath him as they slowly came down from the high of orgasm. Arthur’s weight as he rested on his back was heavy, and if they didn’t move soon, the others would come in and find them like this. “That was spontaneous,” he muttered.

“Are you complaining?”

A shiver went down his spine as Arthur shifted a little. “No…but you could pull out before you do that again.”

He could almost feel the smirk in his hair. “I don’t want to.”

“Look, you have council stuff to do and Gaius needs me.”

Finally Arthur eased back, separating their hips. Merlin quickly pulled his pants up and by the time he turned around, Arthur had already fixed his clothes. “Isn’t today another one of your examinations?”

Merlin grimaced a bit at being reminded. It had been eight months since he’d started taking the herbs and after the first five, Kilgharrah had suggested that it might be hopeless, but Merlin was nothing if not stubborn. He didn’t want to stop. It wasn’t as if there weren’t plenty of opportunity; their hands were all over each other most of the day and night. “Yeah. Last one I had was two months ago.”

There was a moment of silence before Arthur eased his fingers into Merlin’s hair and made their eyes meet. “Merlin, I know you don’t want to hear this, but if it hasn’t…happened by the end of the year, let’s stop.”

“Arthur—”

“Promise me, Merlin. If by the end of the year nothing has happened, we’ll stop trying with the herb. And no going behind my back and continuing to use it.”

He pouted, but Arthur really knew him well. He couldn’t agree and still do it because that would be breaking a promise with the man he dearly loved and he just…couldn’t do that. Three months, then. That’s all he had left to make this work. “Fine.”

“Don’t think this is your fault if it doesn’t happen. I can’t deny it would have been nice, more than nice, to have children with you, but I’m just as happy without them too, so long as you’re here.”

Merlin hugged him lightly and pulled away just as the door opened. He slipped out as the old advisers glared at him. Those in the castle, servant wise, had settled down and didn’t regard him with suspicion anymore and he thanked Gwen and the knights for that, but almost by contrast, those of noble birth and advisers seemed to hate him more to make up for it. That he was a sorcerer, that he was male, that he had tied Arthur to him and was unable to give him an heir… Merlin didn’t know which it was, but knowing his luck, it would be all of it.

Gaius looked up as Merlin entered. “Ah, Merlin. How are you feeling today?”

“Same as ever, I guess,” he said with a shrug and sat on the table when Gaius gestured him to.

“What’s bothering you then?” the physician asked as he began looking him over, though for _what_ , Merlin wasn’t sure.

How did he always know? “Arthur said that if this doesn’t work, if I’m not pregnant by the end of the year, that he wants to stop trying.”

“Sounds reasonable, I suppose.”

“He forbid me from continuing without telling him too.”

“At least he knows you,” Gaius told him with a long look, hands moving down from his chest and lightly touched his stomach. Merlin couldn’t help it. He hissed and leaned back away from it. “Merlin, what’s wrong?”

“Sorry, Gaius, my stomach’s been a bit sore.”

An old, wizened eyebrow rose. “Really. Have you been doing anything that would affect it?”

“Well…no. I mean, yes, Arthur tends to bend me over tables and chairs and desks a lot, but that part is always on my chest.”

Gaius hummed deep in his throat. “Lay down, Merlin.”

“Do you think…”

“Just lay down. Don’t get excited just yet.”

Merlin suffered through the gentle touching to his stomach. It didn’t hurt, but it just felt the way a sore, overused muscle did after extensive work. He watched Gaius’ face the whole time, but he had never met someone that had a better blank expression than the physician. No wonder he was able to lie to Uther so often and the man never even suspected!

“Is there any place that you also feel sore or sensitive other than your stomach?”

He coughed a little. “Not that I noticed at the time… I mean, yes, I feel sensitive in…certain areas, but when that happens, Arthur and I are usually…”

Finally Gaius pulled his hands back and braced them on the edge of the table. “Then touch your chest for me now, when Arthur isn’t here. Just to see.”

Merlin squirmed in mortification. This was not what he wanted to do with the eyes of his father figure on him…but Gaius was looking at him as a physician and not a mentor. So he gulped and forced himself to lift his hand and touch one of his nipples. He quickly pulled his hand away. “They…tingle a little.”

Gaius pursed his lips a bit before saying, “Well, Merlin, you might indeed be with child, but I won’t say for certain yet. If you are, you’re not very far along. Your stomach does feel slightly rounded, but you _have_ been eating more ever since you married Arthur. When you still lived here, you were thin as a rail. Now often pregnant mothers do report their nipples tingle a little and feel sensitive, but there are _other_ explanations for that. It isn’t _conclusive_.”

He sat up quickly. “Is there another test you can do to find out?”

“On you? No. This is a magically induced pregnancy, in a man. There’s no mundane test that I can give that will tell me definitively.”

“But it’s magical, so…”

Gaius caught on to what he was thinking and nodded slowly. “Kilgharrah _might_ be able to tell you, but if he doesn’t, we’ll just have to wait and see.”

He all but leapt off the table and ran out of the room, hearing his name echoing after him. He didn’t have time to find any of the knights or Gwen, even though if he really was pregnant and he went out alone, Arthur would ream him for it. He at least remembered to pull on a cloak so he didn’t look quite as noticeable leaving Camelot.

Once he was out of sight, he burst into a run, calling Kilgharrah as he did so. Excitement, adrenaline, and even apprehension was flooding his veins, infecting his voice, and by the time he reached the clearing, Kilgharrah was already there. He literally stumbled in, needing to grab the dragon’s leg to keep himself from falling flat on his face.

“Merlin, why have you called me? It sounds urgent—”

“Am I with child?!” It was the first time he’d ever managed to stun the dragon into silence. “Gaius says I might be, but he has no test to tell for sure. If it’s magically related, and to _dragon_ magic at that, can you tell?”

The dragon’s tail lashed a bit from side to side and he lowered his head until they were level. Merlin forced himself to stand in the same place as large nostrils breathed in his scent deeply and let it out in a hot puff over him. Kilgharrah’s eyes narrowed and he straightened. “You are, indeed.”

Merlin had to bite his lip to contain a shout of joy. It worked! “Can you tell what it is?”

“No. It is too soon, but even if it wasn’t, I could not tell. That will be your surprise, Merlin, when you give birth.” The dragon eyed him for a moment. “I did not think I’d see the day. I have never personally witnessed a man carry a child even when magic was plentiful. We are both very lucky, dragonlord.”

“What do you mean?”

“If you were to die without an heir, so would the dragons as a dragon egg cannot hatch without a dragonlord. We are tied together, Merlin. Now the dragons and dragonlords can live on, and so can the Pendragon line.” Kilgharrah actually let out a heavy laugh. “Oh, the irony is lovely. Uther did everything he could to stamp out magic and the dragonlords, and his grandchild shall be both. Also, I find it quite amusing that the Pendragon line shall be the one to continue that of the dragonlords.”

“It is kind of poetic,” Merlin said. Honestly the thought of being a dragonlord and the dragons hadn’t crossed his mind when he’d considered this plan. No wonder Kilgharrah had told him how to do it. “But I thought there was only dragon egg left and that hatched Aithusa. Aithusa is male…”

“There may be more in the world,” Kilgharrah said mysteriously and Merlin frowned at him.

“More dragons or more eggs?”

Instead of answering, Kilgharrah leapt into the sky and left him. Merlin did figure he and the dragon were friends, but if there was one thing that annoyed him, it was Kilgharrah’s _non_ -answers. He thought that had stopped once they both knew he was a dragonlord, but some things never changed. Shrugging at himself, he turned and hurried back to Camelot.

Before he could stop it, his feet began to run and he didn’t bother covering his head with the cloak as entered Camelot again. He ducked and dodged around people with a certain skill now, having done it for so long in a hurry, and he had a single thought that maybe he should wait…

Like usual, Merlin didn’t listen that part of his brain and he burst into the council chambers. Arthur was standing, leaning over slight to point at something on a piece of parchment. Gaius was there, apparently even being late he’d decided to show up.

“Merlin?”

He jogged forward and if he threw himself into Arthur’s arms, then he’d never acknowledge it later. Arthur, not expecting it, wrapped his arms around the sorcerer even as he stumbled back and Leon and Gwaine, standing guard this time, had to reach out to keep him from landing on the floor.

“Merlin!” Arthur complained.

Merlin didn’t bother looking at the disapproving muttering behind him and allowed himself to be put on his feet. “Arthur, it’s done!”

The king’s eyes slowly began to widen. “You don’t mean…”

“Yes! I’m pregnant!”

The silence in the room was deafening, but neither man noticed. Merlin was grinning ear to ear, watching as Arthur looked at his stomach, back to his face, then his stomach and up again. He did that several times before a slow grin began to form. Merlin squeaked as he was lifted up again and swung around once before being placed on the table. He let out a soft moan as Arthur kissed him and he resisted the urge to melt onto his back on top of all the documents that neither really cared about right then.

There was the scraping of a chair behind him as one of the noble lords stood up. “Your Majesty, may I ask what he’s talking about?”

There was a long moment where their lips didn’t part, Arthur not seeming to have any interest in doing anything other than ravishing Merlin’s mouth. It was Gaius’ deliberate clearing of his throat that managed to break their lips apart. Hands were still firm on his hips, keeping the sorcerer close, and Arthur didn’t even look at the man as he said, “Merlin has been using an herb with a spell to help him conceive. It’s been so long, I didn’t think it would work. How did you know?” he asked Merlin curiously.

“Kilgharrah told me.”

That was apparently the wrong answer because Arthur frowned. “Did you take anyone with you when you went to meet him?”

“Um…”

“Merlin…” was the warning mutter.

“I was _fine_ , Arthur. I was gone for twenty minutes!”

“You leave Camelot again without at least one knight with you and I will chain you to the bed. Am I understood?”

“I can take care of myself, Arthur! I’ve saved your life how many times? I _lost count_.”

“And do you think for one minute I’ve forgotten all the times you were injured? What about when you were sliced from hip to shoulder by a sword because you didn’t see him? You can’t see _everything_ around you, Merlin. I wouldn’t go out by myself and I can take care of myself too, no matter what you seem to think. So, are you going to obey your king or should I start looking for manacles?”

Merlin rolled his eyes in annoyed disgust. “Fine, fine! I’ll take someone with me if you _insist_. I’m sure you won’t mind if I take _Lancelot_ with me.”

He couldn’t help the dig, enjoyed it when Arthur gritted his teeth and a flash of jealousy went through his eyes. “No, that will be fine.”

He grinned a bit. “Good, now you might want to see to your nobles.”

Arthur finally looked away from Merlin, and the sorcerer glanced around. Most of those in the room were looking a tad shell-shocked and Gaius was leaning over an old man that was clutching at his shirt over his heart, clearly concerned about a heart attack. Maybe bursting in like this hadn’t been a good idea…

The king cleared his throat and managed to look slightly chagrinned. “I suppose I should have mentioned we were trying for a child...—”

“Do you think so?” one adviser hissed in frustration. “We’re getting very tired of being surprised, King Arthur. First your engagement and marriage to a servant, your _manservant_ at that, then to find out that he is a sorcerer at a celebration thrown for a neighboring king, and then finding out you created a Court Sorcerer position just for him at the same time as the rest of Camelot, repealing the ban on magic, and now _this_.”

Arthur frowned and Merlin slowly began to worry that maybe they had pushed the nobles too far. The worry and concern of the servants and ‘common people’ had eased, trusting Arthur without any political ambitions clouding their judgment. They didn’t care about Merlin’s ‘influence’ over Arthur when they saw that their lives were unchanged. Gwen had whispered to him once that she had heard concerns from those in town when his magic was revealed because they had been concerned policies would suddenly change like that sham of a wedding when Uther had been placed under a spell by a troll.

Yet Arthur had remained firm just as he always had and little by little over the months, they had relaxed. By the very same token, the lords had grown angered because of all the quick changes. Their advice, to them, wasn’t seemingly taken into account and they really didn’t seem to like being left out of the loop. Gwaine’s hand was resting on the hilt of his sheathed sword, watching intently and Leon was within inches of them, ready to throw himself in front of the two royals if he needed to.

“There is a reason I didn’t tell you: because we didn’t think it would actually work. When the idea was presented, we were warned that the likelihood of it succeeding was rare. I didn’t see the need to mention it to you because after eight months, there had been no change. Why upset Camelot and cause concern when there was little chance of success? I was trying to keep unrest to a minimum. I _have_ been throwing a lot at the people of Camelot and they needed time to adjust.”

Gaius stood up, drawing attention to himself in the silence. “This is our King and his Consort’s decision and I will support whatever they have chosen to do. I would also like to point out that this will solve any concern over Arthur’s heir, as the child will have his blood.”

“How can we know that? It was created by magic!”

“You can’t create life out of nothing,” Merlin argued back heatedly. That was why Uther had turned against it: because it _couldn’t_. “This child is not purely magically created. All that the spell did was physically alter _me_ for a short amount of time, and the herb to make me fertile enough that I could conceive _the normal way_. The baby is not made of magic! It’ll be flesh and blood, just as if it was born from a woman! And before a single person says anything, I’ll scream it in any language you want that this is _Arthur’s_ baby and Arthur’s alone!”

He felt his husband’s hands squeeze tightly on his hips at the thought that someone would even consider the idea that Merlin had been unfaithful. “Now, I think we’ve dealt with all the concerns over this. I will make the announcement tomorrow to the rest of Camelot. The council is ended.”

Guards opened the door and the nobles began to file out, one by one, and in between them, Gwen, Lancelot, Percival, and Elyan slipped in. Arthur nodded at the door and Percival closed it with a thud. Merlin sighed and rubbed his face, biting his lip. His joy had been muted with worry that there might be a civil war, at what the nobles might do. Had he pushed things too far this time?

Arthur pulled his hands away from his face and kissed him deeply. It sent a shudder down his spine as he felt the reassurance and love. “Stop worrying,” was whispered to him. “This should be a happy occasion.”

“What’s going on?” Gwen asked, her expression calm as she watched the two affectionate men, and Merlin eyed Lancelot and how he stood so close to her, fingers inches away from hers.

“Merlin is with child,” Leon said, a grin breaking out on the serious man’s face.

Gwen gasped in delight, clapping her hands. “That’s wonderful, Merlin!”

“Does this mean that I can walk down the hall now and not have to worry when I turn the corner that I’m going to see him pressing you against a wall?” Gwaine teased.

“Not likely,” Elyan said and the two men laughed.

“Gaius, do you know how far along he is?”

“Not very, but enough that symptoms have occurred. When it is time for the birth, I believe we will have to…surgically remove the child. But that is not an immediate concern.”

Arthur wrapped his arm around Merlin, pulling him close enough that when Merlin shifted his head, his nose lightly brushed along those sharp, high cheekbones. “The nobles didn’t take the news well.”

“Do you think there is the possibility of an armed conflict?” Lancelot asked in concern.

“I don’t know. They just found out today. We’ll see in the next few days if they simmer down or not.”

Percival frowned deeply. “I swear on my life, I will protect both of you and your child.”

Merlin bit his lip. Of all of them, Percival was the one that had had a family, children that had been taken from him. He would be the first to fight to death to protect them so what happened to him didn’t happen to Arthur. Now, for him, it would be personal, and Merlin silently apologized for bring this into his life.

“Kilgharrah said that the child will be a dragonlord,” he blurted, not wanting to keep any secrets.

“A dragonlord and a king, probably a sorcerer. Planning to have this kid rule the world, Arthur?” Gwaine joked.”

Arthur rolled his eyes, but there was a grin on his face regardless. “In a week’s time, we will hold a celebration in the courtyard that anyone is welcome to attend. In the meantime, I think a private celebration is in order.”

Merlin grinned as Gwaine pretended to groan. “More worrying about turning corners! And I thought they’d _slow down_ if it worked!”


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This might have turned out to be a tad more fluffy than originally intended considering the great news we have regarding one of my mother's cancers. So...I couldn't write something serious to save my soul. Hope you like fluffy smut instead

There was no major announcement of Merlin’s pregnancy like when his magic had been revealed, but it really didn’t take long to get around. News of the official celebration spread like wildfire and the _reason_ for the celebration moreso. Notes had been sent to their allies and while there was not enough time for any to arrive by the time the celebration was held, there would be congratulatory gifts, he was sure, for his future child.

“Are you sure we should keep Merlin in the dark about this?” Elyan asked in concern after the advisers had left. The other knights had come to surround his chair in concern.

Arthur quietly kept his husband out of the loop for the talks he had with the advisers because he didn’t want the man to feel guilty in the slightest. He wanted to keep that happy expression on his sorcerer’s face for as long as possible. “I don’t want to concern him at the moment. This could all turn out to be nothing.”

“It’s been three days, sire, and their resistance to the idea hasn’t abated,” Lancelot pointed out cautiously.

“That’s not true. Lord Vivold has come around.”

“Lord Vivold is almost as young as you are!”

“What’s your point, Percival?”

“My point is that those of his age are more open-minded. There are younger lords that have come to our sides, which is all well and good, but they don’t have the power that the older lords do. They are the ones that can incite riots or worse.”

“There is no _side_! There’s just Camelot right now and I will not court disaster and civil war before it starts,” Arthur told them with a frown.

“Coming back to the point,” Lancelot argued, “Merlin would not want to be kept out of the loop.”

“And he won’t be, not forever. For right now, I don’t see any reason to alarm him. You all know as well as I do that Merlin worries excessively and I don’t want to risk him doing something _stupid_ , like leaving.”

“You really think he’d go that far?” Gwaine asked.

“Yes, I really do. Merlin’s love and loyalty humble me, but they also drive him to extremes trying to handle a problem on its own. Let’s find out if there _is_ a problem first before we bring it up.”

Though the knights exchanged glances, they reluctantly agreed in the end to keep what they knew silent for the time being. Arthur stood from his chair and walked around the table toward the door, trying to tamp down on the worry he felt. He didn’t want to tear Camelot apart over this and part of himself knew he should have insisted on waiting a few years. Another part argued that it was entirely possible they would react this way no matter how much time had passed and given how long it took for Merlin to conceive…

Well there was no reason to second guess himself. It couldn’t be changed, so he would make the best of it that he could. He wished he had someone he could ask advice of, but even if Uther were still alive, he had a pretty good idea that he’d probably hate everything Arthur had done in the past year.

It hurt, in a way, to know bone deep in his soul that his father would hate everything he’d done. He bit his lip, wondering if he had made the right choices, but a very familiar voice carried down the hall to him, interrupting his concerns and second guessing. He smiled as he looked up and saw Merlin ahead of him. He studied his back, his hair that had grown a bit longer, and though he couldn’t see the man’s face, he knew that his husband would be smiling.

No, he had done what he felt was right and how could that be wrong? His father had been a good, if harsh, king. Even knowing what he did, Arthur could never hate him and he would defend him against any that called him a tyrant or a murderer. Uther had had his reasons for doing what he did just as Arthur had. It was almost ironic that they both stemmed from the same source: the person they loved. He wondered if the method they had chosen to use would have worked for Yggraine…but he would never know.

Arthur straightened a bit as Merlin turned around and spotted him. His grin, as he had expected, was as wide as the sun. There was a contentment that he hadn’t seen in…well, ever. Between hiding his magic almost all his life before this point, what had transpired to get them married, and knowing the resistance to it, had Merlin ever really felt content before? With all the problems they’d had, was it so surprising that he couldn’t recall the last time that he had seen the man he loved like that?

It made him all the more certain not to tell Merlin of the lords’ behavior. If he did, that contentment would disappear and he would look worried again. So Arthur would prolong that as much as he could just to see him happy. It was his duty as a king and a husband, and he wanted to more than anything.

“Something wrong?” Merlin asked, jogging over.

“No.” His arm slipped around Merlin’s waist as he began to walk, bringing the man with him. “Let’s go for a ride.”

“Okay… Just a ride, not a hunt?”

“Yes. I don’t feel like hunting right now. In fact, I think…a picnic is in order.”

“A _picnic_?”

Arthur eyed Merlin’s surprised face. “You have an objection?”

“N-No, but… I’ve been on picnics before with you—”

“As my manservant, not as my husband and the one I love. I pamper you, Merlin, so humor me.”

“So high maintenance,” Merlin said with a roll of his eyes and a grin. “I’ll get the horses.”

“No, you won’t. You’re not my manservant anymore.” He stopped a passing servant. “A picnic basket and get our horses ready.”

They finally reached the courtyard and waited. Arthur’s arm was firm, tightening every time Merlin muttered about how he could get it done faster if he would just let him go. George, ever efficient, was the one that hurriedly brought the basket out. He hid a grimace. Not that the man wasn’t good, because he was a king’s dream, but…

As the stablehand brought the horses, Arthur said, “Thank you, George.” He had managed to forestall a list of what was packed. “I appreciate how quickly you managed it.”

“Yes, sir.” George looked over and frowned at the two horses.

At his stare, the stableboy winced a bit. “’M’sorry, sire. I didn’t think—”

“It’s fine, it will just be Merlin and I going.”

“But sir—” George protested as Arthur placed Excalibur in its holder on the saddle and swung up, waiting for Merlin to do the same.

“Thank you, George, that will be all.”

The finality in his tone stopped any further arguments. In fact, it probably would have worked on anyone but Merlin. He grinned a little at the thought and turned the horse, quickly heading out of the palace, his husband right on his heels. As they rode further and further away, Arthur felt his shoulders lighten little bit by little bit. Out here he didn’t have to worry about who approved or disapproved of anything.

Their run slowed after a bit and Arthur found a spot near a stream. Merlin was grinning in a particular way he knew so very well and his eyes narrowed. “What?” he asked, dismounting and grabbing the basket.

“I’m just wondering if you know how to set out anything in that basket. _I_ did all the work before and I think I’ve earned the rest after all the work I did to conceive your child. It takes a lot of effort to satisfy _you_ ,” Merlin teased.

“First, you enjoyed every bit if I recall. In fact, you were very _loud_ in your appreciation and begged for more. Secondly, I _am_ capable of doing things on my own without a manservant.” Arthur laid out the blanket and Merlin flopped on it, grinning like a loon.

“Are you gonna hand-feed me?”

“Don’t push it,” Arthur warned him, but he knew that he’d probably end up doing it anyway. He set out the contents of the basket and almost frowned. George might be efficient, but did they really need _this_ much food? It was impossible to eat it all…

“Um…pregnant I might be, but even I can’t eat that much,” Merlin said, eerily echoing Arthur’s thoughts.

He shrugged. “Just eat what you want then.”

“You’re sure this is all right with you?”

The question was asked with what he was sure Merlin wanted as nonchalance, picking over the food and grabbing a cherry, but there was something about the way his eyes looked that told Arthur this wasn’t a nonchalant question. He could have said ‘it’s a little late now to ask that question’, because it was, but he only knew that would give Merlin the wrong impression. “I’m sure,” he said, reaching over and tugging Merlin into his lap. The sorcerer straddled his waist as Arthur leaned against the tree at his back. “What about you?”

“I’m really fine with it. I’m happy, even. You’ll be a great father, Arthur.”

“If I’m ready to be one,” he admitted. “Two things scare me, Merlin: that I could be a terrible father, and that I’ll lose you in the birth, and we won’t know either until after it’s over and there’s no going back.”

Merlin’s eyes looked wise as he smiled. “I’m not worried at all, at least about the first one. If you could see you the way that I’ve seen you, you’d understand: watching you grow from the selfish, prattish, rude, and almost cruel man that you were into one who’s kind, fair, and honorable. You’re not just the image of what a knight should be, but what a _man_ should be.”

He sighed softly. “What did I do to deserve you?” he asked honestly, bringing Merlin’s slim fingers to his lips and kissing the back of his hand.

“I think that question should be the other way around.”

Arthur shifted until he had rolled Merlin onto his back and he settled over top of him. “I love you, Merlin.”

Merlin grinned a bit and lifted his leg up, lightly running it along Arthur’s. “Is this why you didn’t want George here? You couldn’t have your wicked way with me if he was?”

“Well, I _have_ made an honest man out of you, so there’s no holding back,” Arthur teased back, kissing his lips lightly but repeatedly. Nothing would ever, ever make him let go of Merlin. Nothing.

“Have you ever regretted marrying me?”

The question made Arthur blink, fingers pausing as they’d begun to slide down Merlin’s sides. He eyed the man, expecting to see guilt or hesitance, but there was none. All he saw was a curiosity in his eyes, hands languidly running along Arthur’s clothed back. “No,” he said honestly. “Nor was it ever a hardship.” He paused. “Well…”

Merlin latched on his word. “What?”

“It _was_ a hardship when I was holding back and trying _not_ to ravish you,” he admitted and allowed his hand to lightly caress Merlin’s stomach. It shivered under his careful touch. Arthur knew, thanks to Gaius, that the muscles were sore and the physician’s working theory was that it was they were slowly beginning to shift and move to accommodate the man’s new condition.

There was a heavy laugh from Merlin and Arthur took the opportunity to slip his hand into his husband’s pants and grip him softly. The laugh turned into a soft gasp. “A-Arthur, _really_?”

“Are you objecting?” he asked as he twisted his wrist just so and he felt Merlin slowly harden. “Just relax, I’m here to protect you.” He nibbled on Merlin’s neck, taking his time, exploring the flesh he felt in an unhurried fashion.

“Don’t…need your protection.”

“When you’re this vulnerable you do,” he murmured, enjoying the feeling of protecting the sorcerer. Maybe it was because Merlin was right, he really didn’t need protection most of the time, but like this, aroused and as boneless as he was just then, if anything came up on them, he would need protection. They were equals on the battlefield, just with different skills, so Arthur would revel in this rare time when he could take care of Merlin instead of the other way around.

Soft little moans he delighted in were escaping, but despite his own arousal, he made no move to do anything other than languidly pleasure the man he loved. “You won’t eat?” he asked, reaching above their heads with his other hand to grab some grapes from the basket. With dexterous fingers, he separated one plump fruit from its bundle and rested against those flushed lips.

A whimper escaped Merlin, but his mouth parted and Arthur shuddered as he watched the fruit disappear, wrapped lightly around by his tongue. “I will never…be able to eat…grapes again,” he moaned out a complaint, lightly thrusting up his hips before Arthur leaned in just a little to calm him.

The king grabbed another and rested it on his mouth just as he squeezed once. The delighted little cry opened his lips and the grape plopped down before it exploded in taste all over Merlin’s mouth once his teeth cracked the soft casing. His eyes were glued to his husband, unable to look away. Long eyelashes were fluttering against Merlin’s cheeks, closed, he murmured in approval when Arthur gently nibbled on his earlobe.

He moaned softly when he felt Merlin reach out to touch him, palming him through his pants. Though he wanted it so badly, he gently eased the hand away and to his shoulder instead. “Later,” he whispered, voice dark with promise. A third, then a fourth grape disappeared and by that point even with the gentle pace, Merlin was throbbing and squirming a little beneath him.

“A-Arthur,” he whined. “P-please…”

“More grapes?”

“N-No!” Merlin bit his lip, chewing on it a bit. “I want…your fingers…”

It didn’t take much to figure out what he wanted and his hand eased down into the back of Merlin’s pants. “Is this what you want?” he asked, slipping a single digit inside.

“Mhm… _yesss_. Move…faster…now!”

“This is fine,” he argued back, gently thrusting a second finger in and keeping it slow and steady. Arthur was enjoying taking Merlin apart like this far too much to change anything now. Finally, with a sweet wail that Arthur memorized, he felt his lover spurt over his hand and collapse back onto the blanket below them.

“What was that for?” he heard the dazed voice ask.

“No reason,” he replied, easing his hands back up and licking his fingers clean. He wrapped his arm around Merlin’s waist, tugging him close and feeling Merlin curl up against his side, cramming their bodies close.

“What about you?”

“In a bit,” Arthur told him. “I’m in no rush today.”

“I could tell.”

Finally he looked down at the head nuzzling and pillowing on his chest. “So did you ever have any regrets about our marriage?”

Merlin’s delighted by slightly embarrassed and shy smile made him fall in love all over again. “Not for a second.”


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter gave me a ton of trouble on writing it and I'm not entirely happy with it. It was like pulling teeth and my imagination fairy was sulking in a corner until I prodded her to work. Theoretically, I could have ended it here, but I suppose everyone wants to see the baby :P So give me one or two more chapters and I believe the story will be wrapped up and done.

“Why didn’t you tell me?!” Merlin demanded with a glare.

Arthur sighed, dropping his quill on his desk. “Because you were happy, Merlin. I didn’t want to upset you or have you feel guilty.”

Merlin opened his mouth to continue arguing, but stopped at the last minute. That was what he had done with Arthur for years, not telling him what was going on so he wouldn’t be put in an awkward position. Could he really yell at Arthur for doing the same?

“So how bad is it?” he asked instead.

The king stared at him, clearly having braced himself for a long rant. “It’s not terrible,” he replied, but Merlin gave him a long look and he shrugged. “I’m being honest. The older lords are the problem and I’ve apparently thrown too much at them too soon.”

“Too soon?! How much more time did they want?”

“I don’t know. In the past two weeks, the majority of the lords, particularly younger ones, have finally begun to embrace the situation, but the others… They want certain concessions I’m not willing to give.”

The way Arthur said the word ‘concessions’ made it seem as if it was a curse word. Since he knew that Arthur didn’t mind compromises, it had to have something to do what just _what_ those concessions were. “What do they want?”

“For a start? Once I said that I would not reinstitute the ban against magic, they want me to limit the use of it, particularly yours. They also want me to send you away to a country estate for the foreseeable future. They haven’t made any particular requests about our baby yet, but I’m sure that’s to come.”

Merlin watched as Arthur’s hand clenched into a fist tightly and there was a sense of restrained fury in his jaw. “What did you tell them?”

“Something that in hindsight sounded a bit tyrannical.”

Merlin moved over to Arthur’s chair and eased into his lap as the king rubbed his eyes, forcing the tension out of his shoulders. “What’d you say, Arthur?”

“I told them that they had no right to ask me to make concessions because I’m king and if they brought up any of that again, I would strip them of their nobility without hesitation.” One hand rested lightly on Merlin’s hip as their eyes met. “I _should_ feel guilty about saying it, but I…really don’t. I just can’t lose you, Merlin, and the way they’re treating you is unforgivable. That they delayed the celebration we had planned for a week—”

“Well the celebration is tonight, so stop being upset about that.” Merlin honestly wasn’t sure _what_ to feel at hearing what Arthur had said. He appreciated it very much, but it bothered and upset him that Merlin’s very existence right then was forcing him to do things like that.

Lips abruptly touched his and he moaned softly, his dark thoughts scattering. “Whatever it was you’re thinking, stop it,” Arthur ordered him. “None of this is your fault.”

“Do you think they’ll start an uprising?”

“Part of me wants to say ‘let them try’, but I’m sure there will always be dissidents and I don’t want those that do support me have to live through a civil war.”

“So what are you planning on doing?”

“I don’t know. I refuse to give in to their demands about you, but I fear that in order to keep the peace, they’ll use this to force me to give in to other requests that I don’t want to.”

Merlin resisted the urge to apologize and instead tried to think of a solution to give Arthur. He really wasn’t very good at these political machinations… “I could—”

“No.”

“You didn’t even let me speak!”

“If you’re thinking about leaving, the answer is no.”

“It would just be for a little while, to let the lords calm down!”

Blue eyes flashed in anger and Arthur frowned. “No. You’re not leaving even for a little while. This city, this palace, is your home too and you shouldn’t be forced out because they’re uncomfortable. Don’t argue with me on this, Merlin.”

Merlin threw up his hands in frustration, but his husband was pulling him closer against his chest and frustratingly, he was relaxing into such a simple action. Hands that had wrapped around him were easing down to his stomach and resting there, lips nudging at his neck, and this really wasn’t fair. He was trying to be annoyed and Arthur just wasn’t letting him.

“Merlin, I’m trying to make this a place that you would feel…proud to call your home and a good place to raise our child. If I allow them to bully you into making you leave, how can either of those be true?”

He sighed. There was no arguing with Arthur when he was like this, he’d never listen. He’d just have to talk to Leon about it. He was the only one that Merlin knew that was both actually born of nobility and would be less protective.

-0-

“Absolutely not, Merlin!”

Merlin’s jaw dropped a bit. “What? Why not? I just explained—”

Leon sighed and sat down on the bench, just the two of them in the armory. “Disregarding the fact that Arthur would have my head if you left, it won’t matter. You’ll be giving the lords that resist this help by doing so because they will see that while they can’t force the king into doing what they want, they can force _you_ into doing it for them. It’ll only encourage them to do it more.”

He paced in frustration. “There must be _something_ I can do, Leon! This is my fault, but I don’t know how to fix it.”

“First of all, this is nobody’s fault and Arthur will be the first to tell you that. Second, this isn’t your fault. Third, the celebration is an _hour_ , Merlin, you need to get ready.”

“Leon—”

The knight stood up and gripped Merlin’s shoulder, steering him toward the door. “There really isn’t anything that can be done right now about this, but I promise if I think of something you _can_ do that will help, I’ll tell you.”

“You swear?”

“I swear, Merlin. Right now, what Arthur needs most is you being happy and here for him. It’s entirely possible that the lords will come around if they see they can’t push Arthur into anything. It’s a waiting game for all of us, not just you.”

He pouted, but allowed himself to be escorted to his room to quickly change into the robes that Arthur had had made for him for the celebration. To be honest, Merlin liked this idea of a celebration a lot better than the feast at the wedding because the entire courtyard was set up and everyone in Camelot was invited, not just the nobles. He headed to the balcony where Arthur usually made proclamations and paused in the doorway. His husband was sitting on the stone railing, complete in his kingly robes, cape, and crown, watching the crowd with an indulgent eye. More than a few people were below, glancing up, as if waiting for something.

He felt a hand shove at his back and he stumbled forward, turning to glare over his shoulder at Gwaine, who just grinned in an unrepentant fashion. When he looked back, Arthur was gesturing to him and he joined the king with a bit of hesitation in his step. He still wasn’t used to all the staring and attention. As Arthur lifted his hand to his lips to kiss the back of it, he looked down just in time to see people start clapping. It was just a few at first, his friends, and then it grew until the packed courtyard was applauding.

Entertainers slipped in and out among the crowd as servants from the palace filtered out to set out trays of food and bread, cheese and meats. Something for people to pick up and eat with their hands as they mingled and enjoyed the ceremony and entertainment. Merlin watched quietly, Arthur’s arm sliding around his waist to pull him closer.

“What do you think?”

“I think you’re a king that cares a lot for his people and it shows. I think you’re a king that can make this city exactly what you want, where everyone is equal and happy.”

“You know what I think?” Arthur said. “I think I’m a king that is completely in love with his husband and will do anything he asks if it’ll make him happy.”

Merlin blushed heavily, glancing at Arthur out of the corner of his eye, but while there was a hint of a smirk on his face, the look in his eyes was genuine. He leaned down to steal a kiss, muttering, “Keep that up and you won’t be around in the celebration for long.”

“Why? Do you have a bed with my name on it?”

“How about a wall—”

“You two can’t leave early and you know it.”

Merlin yelped a little, pulling back and turning a fiery red at Gwen’s sudden presence. She was looking at them with a smile, as if amused and pleased, while also being annoyed at their behavior. “G-Gwen!”

“It’s hard enough to corral Arthur to do his job when you’re _not_ tempting him, Merlin.”

Honestly, his cheeks felt like they were burning and even Arthur was looking a tad embarrassed. He glanced down, needing somewhere else to put his eyes, and saw that a space had been cleared for dancing. He felt a shudder go through his stomach. He’d never dance with Arthur again, after what happened _last_ time.

“It’s not like that, Gwen,” Arthur defended himself, arm tightening a little around Merlin’s waist.

“Oh yes it is, even more so after you found out Merlin was pregnant. You just can’t keep your hands off each other. I thought it would wear off a month or two after you became…intimate, but apparently I was wrong.”

Merlin had expected to hear bitterness, frustration, or annoyance in her tone, but instead it was fond exasperation. He eyed her and she seemed…happy. She had dressed up for the occasion, in that pale lavender dress with the gold-colored corset that he always thought looked so good on her. “Did Lancelot ask you to dance yet?” She was the one blushing this time and he grinned. “Are you two…?”

“We’re just…friends.”

“Uh huh. Arthur and I are _just friends_ too.”

She smacked him lightly on the arm, despite her grin, and disappeared back into the palace. A moment later, he watched her enter the courtyard and it didn’t take long to spot Lancelot working his way toward her.

“I’m happy for her,” Arthur said abruptly. “I think Lancelot can make her happier than I ever could.”

“Eh, probably right. I don’t think she could survive your _attentions_ like I have.”

“Are you insinuating that you’re making a great sacrifice for the kingdom by bedding me?”

“Of course. Do you know how much work it is to bend over for you on a daily basis?” he teased and yelped a little when Arthur pinched his rear in retaliation.

“Keep _that_ up and I’ve got a desk with _your_ name on it to bend you over.”

A breeze fluttered Arthur’s cloak a little and Merlin felt his concerns over the lords slip away entirely. There was a happy look on his friend’s face, content, and he began to realize why Arthur hadn’t told him about the lords before. He didn’t want to bring it up and see that expression fade. He leaned down, letting their lips nuzzle together and shared kiss after soft kiss, enjoying the way Arthur leaned up toward him a little.

“What was that for?” the king asked in between the little pecks.

“I have to have a reason?”

“…No. Not at all.”


	14. Chapter 14

He lightly touched his stomach, feeling the roundness. There was no denying his current condition, no matter what shirt he might choose to wear and he’d had to put in several new notches in his belt in the past two months. He sighed as he cinched it shut, gasping in surprise as abruptly he felt Arthur grab him from behind and kiss his neck. “Not a good idea,” he muttered. “My magic is kind of volatile right now.”

“You’d never hurt me,” Arthur told him, running his hands over Merlin’s stomach in a loving caress. “Did you sleep well?”

“I miss being able to sleep on my stomach,” he complained. “This is all your fault.”

His husband had the gall to only laugh at him. “It’s half yours, Merlin.”

“…It’s _still_ all your fault.”

“Are you going to come with me to court? You haven’t been in a while,” the king asked, changing the subject and lightly nipping at his ear.

He shifted in concern. “I was trying not to make it worse for you with the nobles.”

The frown from Arthur could probably be felt all over the castle. “I’ve had it with their demands.”

It had come down to threats now. At least two of the lords had threatened to break with Camelot and revolt if the child wasn’t aborted and a third wanted the marriage annulled and Merlin burned for his sorcery and attempt to ‘create an unnatural life’. Heavy pressure from the king had kept all the other lords in line and they had eventually fallen in beside Arthur. Unfortunately the three that were against them had the largest fiefdoms in the kingdom. If revolt wasn’t a bad enough prospect, threatening to pull all the troops and the knights from their lands from Camelot’s service was an added concern.

“I thought this would solve your problem, not create more.”

“This isn’t your fault,” Arthur told him staunchly. “Now are you coming to court with me or not? I won’t force you, but I do want to see you there. Let the other lords know what they’re fighting for.”

As if he could say no to that! Merlin sighed and nodded. “Fine, I’ll come.”

Arthur’s arm wrapped around his waist and he led Merlin to the audience room. That second throne was still there, sitting almost like a monstrosity as it waited for him. He repressed another sigh and sat down, leaning back in it and not caring that it was not a kingly way of sitting in the least. In fact, he was almost sprawled in the seat and there were a few disapproving looks, but Arthur merely chuckled indulgently and took his seat. His hand reached out to rest over Merlin’s before easing forward a bit more, as if he wasn’t aware of what he was doing, and let his fingertips land on his rounded stomach.

Honestly, court bored Merlin to tears even as he desperately tried to pay attention. The younger lords that were around their age, perhaps a bit older, seemed the most relaxed of the nobles. There were three conspicuously empty seats and Arthur eyed them in contemplation. The conversation was dull until the doors opened and Leon entered with a grim look on his face.

“Sire, we have received an ultimatum from Lords Black, Chilton, and Harrow. They demand the child’s death and the marriage annulled, or they will side with Camelot’s enemies to destroy her.”

Merlin felt a cold chill go down his spine and he quickly glanced at Arthur. The man was looking absolutely murderous and he stood slowly. “As King of Camelot, I strip them of their title and land. Do any of them have children?”

“Lord Harrow has a daughter, Elizabeth.”

“Then all his lands will go to her and she will be the Lady Harrow.” There were faint gasps in shock and Merlin’s eyes widened. He had never heard from any history that any female in Camelot had attained such rank. “Make it understood to her that she will take her father’s land, title, and rank, provided she swears fealty to the crown and supports Camelot.”

“Against her own father?” someone asked.

“Yes. If she chooses to follow his path, then a steward will be appointed the land.” He turned to his knights. “Lancelot, Lord Black’s lands now belong to you.”

Honestly, Merlin thought Lancelot’s jaw might hit the floor. “Y-Yes, sire, but…are you sure?”

“He has no living relatives and you have earned those lands and title more than he ever did. You can choose your own steward of your lands to report to you in Camelot if you still wish to remain by my side.”

“I do, sire.”

“As for Lord Chilton…” He glanced at the other knights, but Merlin saw perceptible shakes of their heads. Arthur abruptly turned to him, making him blink in surprise. “I give Merlin the land.”

“ _What_? What do I know… What would I do with it?”

“Whatever you want, Merlin. I have no objection if you, for example, wanted to build a _school_ there.”

A school? What would he—Merlin’s eyes grew wide as saucers as he realized just what Arthur was telling him. “A school for magic?”

“If that’s what you want. Take care of those that still live there in their farms and livelihoods and they will support whatever you wish.” Arthur smiled just a little. “His lands are bordered by mountains with plenty of caves.” Merlin leaned over the table to see the map where Arthur was pointing. Chilton’s lands were bordered by three other fiefdoms and backed by steep hills and mountain ranges, so while it wasn’t exactly the heart of the kingdom, it would be one of the last to be affected by any sort of invasion.

“For practice. And other things.” Like dragons. Merlin grinned in a delighted manner as prospects he had never remotely considered came to light. A haven for the druid people, home for Kilgharrah and Aithusa, and a school where people with magic like him could learn. It might be a bit far from the capital, but he could make it work.

“Will you accept it, Merlin?”

The idea that he would be a noble wasn’t quite clicking with him, but then again, he had trouble thinking of himself as royalty after he’d married Arthur, and the weight of the responsibility was sitting heavily on him even then, but the possibilities of what he could accomplish negated any thought of not following through.

“Yes. Yes, absolutely!”

“Good. Leon, relay my commands. Black, Chilton, and Harrow are banished from my kingdom.”

Leon bowed. “Yes, sire.”

As court ended an hour later, Merlin waited until the room was empty except for the two of them before saying anything. “Won’t this cause an uprising?”

“I’m hoping not,” Arthur told him, bracing his hands on the table and staring at the map. “By stripping them of their nobility they won’t have the power to order any soldiers to do anything. They might be able to find people that are discontented with my rule, but I’m hoping not many and that less than half will be warriors. Even if the three lords unite those they find willing to side with them in their lands, unless it’s the entirety of those that live there, they wouldn’t be able to successfully mount an attack. They could be disarmed with a minimum of bloodshed.”

“And if they leave to one of your enemies?”

“Then they leave. In all honesty, that’s what I’d prefer. Most of those that would stand against me would have little sympathy for them and unless they could prove themselves of great use, would likely not get very far in starting a war. None of them are warriors even in their prime and they do not know as much as they think they do of Camelot’s secrets that they could barter for something else.”

Merlin stood up and came up behind the king, looking over his shoulder at the map, but he didn’t really think Arthur was seeing it so much as something in his mind. “Is there anything I can do?”

“I know how much you want the answer to be yes, but not really, Merlin. This is gambling not on magic or swords, but on how people feel. I have either done enough by my people to have them stand at my side, or I failed. This will be a judgment on me as king, nothing more and nothing less.”

“If you’re right, then we don’t need to worry.”

Arthur snorted, finally lifting his head to look at him. “You never doubt, do you?”

“Doubt what?”

“That I’m a good king.”

“Never,” he said honestly, letting his husband see his conviction in his eyes. “I knew you would be a good king before you _were_ king.”

Arthur’s arm slowly snaked around his waist, pulling him close, and Merlin melted into the kisses. “If you keep praising me, I might soon start to have an ego.”

“Like you don’t have one already,” Merlin half-complained with a smile.

“Careful, I’ll put you in the stocks again.”

“You wouldn’t and you know it.”

“And why wouldn’t I?”

“Because if I’m in the stocks, you can’t get what you need from me.” Merlin winked with a grin.

Arthur’s eyes darkened in delight and he began to smirk. “Oh, I don’t know. You _would_ be bent over…”

There was the sound of someone clearing their throat as Merlin began to contemplate throne sex and he sighed a bit. “Sorry, Gaius is waiting for me.”

“Helping him today?”

“Yes, and he’s going to check me out.”

Arthur gave him a contemplative look before turning to the physician standing quietly in the doorway. “Gaius, can you do your exam here?”

What Merlin called The Eyebrow rose. It could convey so many things: disapproval, surprise, and this time it was intrigued. “I can. I’m assuming it’s because you want to see to his health?”

“I hardly think that dignifies an answer.”

Gaius actually smiled a bit as he came around the table near the thrones. Merlin sat up on the tabletop. “You’re quite protective, sire.”

“I’ve treated Merlin as I always have.”

Merlin shared a glance with Gaius, and The Eyebrow stated its disbelief. Arthur had become downright overprotective since he’d conceived and that had been saying something. He didn’t mention it though, instead sitting still for Gaius’ exam. Both his mentor and his husband had insisted on it every two weeks or so and Merlin found that it was pointless to argue. They’d tie him to a chair if they had to, as he had very unhappily found out the first time he’d tried putting them off.

He watched Arthur as Gaius announced that he was healthy and then moved to check on the baby. “Is your stomach still tender, Merlin?”

“Yeah. Not worse than when it started, but not better either.”

“I don’t expect it will get better until after you give birth.” Gaius prodded him as gently as he could before he stepped back a bit. “I see no problems yet, but I have to warn you both: I think this is a very fragile situation. If any trauma happens to Merlin’s stomach, I would be willing to say in my medical opinion that he will lose the baby. I would highly recommend that any heavy physical activity be kept to a minimum and Merlin should not be leaving Camelot for any reason until after the baby is born.”

“Gaius, I’m fine!” Merlin protested.

“You’re underestimating the amount of stress you’re putting your body under, Merlin. You may not feel it now, you’re only in your fourth month, but soon you will. The more the baby grows, the more delicate your condition. You may be the greatest sorcerer to walk this world, but you have asked your body to do something it was not designed for. It has done as you asked, but don’t ask it to do _more_. If you lose the baby because you were not careful enough, you may never have the opportunity again.”

Merlin wanted to argue more, but one glance at Arthur’s serious and slightly stricken face, and he knew there was no point. While he was stubborn, it would get him nowhere with his husband. Arthur would lock him in a room as many times as necessary even if Merlin could merely unlock the doors with his magic.

Nor could he deny that Gaius’ words put a bit of fear in his mind. He didn’t want to lose their child, or risk that he could never have another. He found himself putting his hand on his stomach, biting his lip in worry. He owed it to the life he carried to be more careful. While he could play with his own life, confident that he could survive and take care of himself, he couldn’t play with the child’s, just as he couldn’t play with Arthur’s. There was no risk worth that. If their safety depended on his own, then he would do anything possible to make sure that he was all right.

“Fine. No leaving Camelot and lifting heavy things.”

“And if you’re going to be intimate, be careful.”

Merlin blushed. “Gaius! I’m not _that_ fragile!”

Gaius finally smiled a little. “I suppose not, at least right now, and I doubt any warnings I give in that regard would be followed.”

Arthur shifted next to him and Merlin felt a bit of dread go down his spine as he finally spoke for the first time since the exam had started. “If that’s the case, then perhaps we should—”

“If you’re about say that we should stop having sex entirely, my baby won’t have a father because I’ll kill him.”

“Merlin—”

“Gaius!” he practically begged.

Gaius looked between the two and said, “You don’t need to go to such extreme lengths, Your Majesty. Such activities can be considered stress-relieving, which I’m sure Merlin would appreciate. Just keep an appropriate amount of caution and consider your surroundings and you should be fine.”

Arthur glanced between them, but he finally relented, trusting the physician’s judgment. “Very well. Merlin, I’ll see you tonight.”

Merlin slid off the table to follow his mentor and help him with what he needed, but he smiled brightly at Arthur. “It’s a date!”


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What Merlin was wearing at the celebration: He was dressed in something slightly less elaborate than his wedding clothes, no cape, but he did wear his crown. Predominately silver in color, with bits of red considering who he’s married to and red is kind of the Pendragon color

Arthur was deep in conversation with the knights when he got word. “We’ve determined that Black, Chilton, and Harrow have already left the kingdom.”

“About time. It only took them three months,” Gwaine griped. “I thought we were going to have to lay siege to get them out.”

Leon pulled a letter from his pocket and handed it to the king. Arthur unrolled it, skimming a letter of dedication. “Lady Harrow says she’s more than willing to come to Camelot itself to swear fealty in person, if you require it.”

“Let her know that it’s not necessary for that. Any word how people are taking it?”

“Lancelot’s due to return tomorrow from going to the Chilton lands, but from all that we’ve heard, it’s been quiet. There has been no uprising or discontent in any of the fiefdoms and it isn’t as if the lords weren’t trying,” Elyan said.

He felt a wave of relief swamp him. Arthur couldn’t believe that his decisions hadn’t caused concern among his people, particularly around Merlin’s magic and his pregnancy, but they were still willing to trust him, to allow him time to prove to them that this was a _good_ thing. He began to grin, soon finding Leon, Percival, Gwaine, and Elyan sharing it.

The doors were pushed open and he blinked as Gwen hurriedly rushed in. “Arthur, it’s Merlin!”

“What? What happened?!”

“Gaius says—”

Arthur didn’t even wait as soon as he heard the physician’s name, instead shouldering past her and running toward his room. This late in the pregnancy and Merlin hadn’t even been able to walk the past few weeks, at least without help, and Gaius had rarely left his side. He heard a yell of pain and he put on a burst of speed, but felt hands quickly grab him from behind just before he reached the door.

“Let go!”

“What are you going to do, if you go in there?” Gwaine tried to reason, gripping Arthur’s arm. Percival had wrapped his arms under the king’s armpits, and Leon and Elyan quickly blocked his way forward. “Gaius already said they’d have to…cut…to get the baby out. Do you really want to be there for that?”

The very idea that Merlin would be in pain like that made him want to scream and hit something, but he knew there was no other way for the baby to be born. “I won’t leave him to do it by himself!”

“I really don’t think it’s wise to go in there, sire,” Leon tried with a gentle tone. “You’re…a bit too overprotective of Merlin, and I don’t think he’d want you to see it anyway.”

Arthur tried his best to get out of the knights’ very firm hold, but they seemed to be expecting each and every move he made. There was another yell of pain and he was more than ready to break Percival’s arms to get out if he had to, but the knights weren’t giving him any bit of leverage to do so. Gwen hurried up to the door and gave Arthur an apologetic look before slipping into the room. Arthur managed to get a glimpse inside, but he couldn’t see the bed from the angle.

“I’m ordering all of you to let me go!” he spat.

“With all due respect, sir, _no_ ,” Gwaine told him with a frown. “We’re doing what’s best for you and Merlin.”

There was the sound of something heavy crashing to the floor, making the men jump a bit in surprise. “What was that?” Elyan muttered, eying the door nervously.

“Merlin’s magic,” the king replied grimly. “He doesn’t have as much control over it since he’s been pregnant.”

Before Arthur could go through with his plan of jamming his heel into Percival’s foot and squirming out of his grip, there was sound of a baby crying. A moment later, Gwen opened the door and nodded. Arthur felt the slightest loosening of the arms that held him and he dashed out of them, shoving Leon and Elyan out of his way.

Merlin was curled on their bed, the sheets thrown the floor and bloody. He tried not to look at the nightstand where a bloody scalpel was lying, as well as bandages. Gaius was holding something wrapped in a small blanket and Merlin’s eyes faded from gold. The naked man pulled his hands away from his stomach and there wasn’t even a scar left behind from where he’d been cut. Even the blood had disappeared.

“My Lord, you have a son,” Gaius said with a soft a smile.

His attention shifted from his husband in an instant and Arthur’s feet stopped moving when the physician approached him and held out the crying bundle. He felt an irrational stab of fear all of a sudden at the thought of holding his son. This was real. Merlin was alive and here was their son and what if he didn’t hold him right? What if—

Percival was the one that saved him. He gently took the boy from Gaius and turned to Arthur, pausing for a moment, before forcing Arthur to hold him. It was enough though. Enough to see, to move his panic aside and study what Percival was showing him, and emulate it. The crying didn’t stop, but it did seem to lessen just a little, or maybe he was just getting used to the sound. There was a small bit of fuzz on his head, but when his son looked up, he had the most stunning blue eyes he’d ever seen.

Gulping as the magnitude of what they had now just hit him, Arthur carefully eased to the edge of the bed and sat down. Merlin, not seeming to care one bit about his nudity in front of Gwen, the other knights, and Gaius, sat up and curled at his side to look down at the boy. “I should have known he’d get your eyes.”

Arthur looked up and he felt his heart melt a little more. Merlin was beaming, looking beside himself he was so happy, and one hand came to land on his shoulder, the sorcerer leaning his weight against the king’s side. “Merlin—”

“I told you, you didn’t have to worry. I promised I’d never leave you and I didn’t. Can you trust me now?”

“It was never about trust, Merlin,” he replied, a little surprised to hear how suddenly hoarse it sounded. “You’re the best part of my life. I was afraid to lose you.” He looked down as the crying slowly began to peter off as the boy started to fall asleep. “Now I have two people to fear for. I can’t lose him either.”

“So long as you don’t let that fear get in the way of your joy, sire,” Gaius told him softly.

“I won’t let it. I swear.” Finally he turned and eased the child into Merlin’s arms. His husband beamed before curling up on his side on the bed, a cocoon of arms around his son. “What should his name be?” he asked quietly. They had never really agreed on any names for either gender.

Merlin hummed a little as he thought. “Amr?” he asked, looking up.

He smiled a little. “That sounds fine.”

“…Really? You’re okay with that? There’s no complaining later.”

Arthur laughed at the skeptical voice; he couldn’t help it. “Yes, I’m fine with it, Merlin.” Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Gaius ushering the knights and Gwen out of the room. When the door was closed and they were alone, he crawled into the bed behind his husband, wrapping his arms around both of his family. “I think it’s a good name.”

“Let’s hope he takes after my personality. You’re _so_ hard to deal with,” Merlin teased. He waited for Arthur’s laughter to die down before whispering, “The best decision I ever made was saying yes to you, Arthur. I’m glad you didn’t let me say no.”

He kissed Merlin’s shoulders softly. “I’ll never let anything hurt you, Merlin. You or Amr. I swear it on my life.” He heard the yawn that his husband was trying to stifle and whispered, “Go to sleep. We’ll be here when you wake up.”

“Promise?”

“Promise.”

-0-

When Merlin woke, the first thing he noticed were the arms that were missing and then worse, no bundle of warmth in front of him. His eyes snapped open, glowing gold, only to calm as he saw the cradle that had been made specifically for them had been placed right next to the bed and inside it, his son still slept.

He shifted onto his back, noting that the heavy wardrobe his magic had knocked over, and a few chairs that were broken, had been righted and replaced respectively. He looked to his left and murmured quietly, “Can’t even take a day off the day your son is born?”

Arthur looked up from his desk and paperwork. “I did. It’s not my fault you slept through it.”

He blinked. “What?”

“It’s the next day, Merlin. Even Amr’s crying in the morning for food didn’t wake you up. We’re lucky that we already had a wet nurse in place for this.” A look of concern passed over Arthur’s eyes, but he didn’t voice the question he was clearly thinking.

“I must have been tired.” He wiggled his fingers and nodded. “My magic is back to normal. Maybe that was it, it just had to settle.” Merlin practically jumped to his feet before leaning over the cradle and reaching down to touch his son’s cheek. The skin was soft, softer than silk, and he barely resisted the urge to pick him up in case he woke the boy.

He felt Arthur come up behind him, wrapping an arm around his waist. “It was barely half an hour that you were in labor and it felt like an eternity. How painful was it?”

“Not painful enough that I don’t want another child with you.”

Arthur groaned, but when Merlin glanced over his shoulder, he saw a smile. “Let’s at least get Amr to age two or three before we try again. Or do we always have to do it your way, barreling ahead without any sense of self-preservation?”

Merlin hummed a little. “I guess we can try it your way this time, but in my defense, your plans _never_ turn out the way you want them to.”

“Only because you keep messing them up.”

Amr stirred below them, blinking, and when he met Merlin’s eyes, he felt his power flare protectively. There was a brief flash of gold below, enough to know that he had inherited his father’s magic, and something about that made Merlin glow in happiness. He wouldn’t have minded if it hadn’t been inherited, but to know that something of his, not just Arthur’s, had been passed on made him strangely happy.

Merlin reached down and picked up his son, who gurgled and smiled. “Let’s go for a walk, Arthur.”

Arthur blinked. “What? Merlin, I have to go over these treaties—”

“Arthur, you’re walking with me and Amr. I’m tired of being stuck in this room. I haven’t been out of here for weeks. Besides, I’m going to introduce Amr to Kilgharrah.”

“And every other magical being in the world, knowing you.” Arthur sighed, but there was a smile and he shrugged on his coat. “Fine. Just one thing.”

He paused in his stalking to the door. “What?”

“You might want to put on some clothes.”

As soon as he realized that Arthur was right and he really was naked, he turned bright red, handed his son over, and all but ran to the wardrobe, as if he could somehow outrun his husband’s laughter.

-End-


End file.
